Kat Posted May 21, 2006 Author Share Posted May 21, 2006 May 20 – Self-Esteem Every Day If you operate self-responsibly and something goes wrong, your response is not, "Someone's gotta do something!" but rather "What can I do? What possibilities for action exist? What needs to be done?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted May 22, 2006 Author Share Posted May 22, 2006 May 21 – Self-Esteem Every Day If you embrace self-responsibility not merely as a personal preference but as a philosophical principle, logically you commit yourself to a profoundly important moral idea. In taking responsibility for your own existence, you implicitly recognize that other human beings are not your servants and do not exist for the satisfaction of your needs. They do not owe you "service." This means you are not entitled to treat other persons merely as means to your ends, just as you are not a means to their ends. You are not entitled to demand that others work and live for your sake, just as you do not live and work for others. Morally and rationally you are obliged to respect everyone's right to self-interest, just as they are obliged to respect yours. This common understanding is the base of civilized relationships. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted May 24, 2006 Author Share Posted May 24, 2006 May 22 – Self-Esteem Every Day Blaming is a dead end. What is needed is to focus on solutions, discovering your own resources and mobilizing the will to use them. What are you willing to do to make your life better? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted May 24, 2006 Author Share Posted May 24, 2006 May 23 – Self-Esteem Every Day Young persons are more likely to learn self-responsibility from adults who exemplify it in their own behavior. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted May 25, 2006 Author Share Posted May 25, 2006 May 24 – Self-Esteem Every Day Young persons are more likely to learn self-responsibility from parents and teachers who expect and require it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted May 25, 2006 Author Share Posted May 25, 2006 May 25 – Self-Esteem Every Day Aside from cases of violent coercion, as when someone points a gun at you, you are responsible for your reactions. No one "makes" you enraged to the point of turning violent. No one "makes" you become sarcastic and abusive. No one "makes" you do things you are ashamed to take responsibility for. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted May 27, 2006 Author Share Posted May 27, 2006 May 26 – Self-Esteem Every Day The paradox is that learning self-responsibility leaves you feeling lighter, not heavier, since now your life is in your own hands. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted May 27, 2006 Author Share Posted May 27, 2006 May 27 – Self-Esteem Every Day Some popular ways of avoiding responsibility are pretending to be confused; reaching for an alibi; blaming and crying, "But that was not in my job description!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted May 28, 2006 Author Share Posted May 28, 2006 May 28 – Self-Esteem Every Day Self-respecting men and women think about the consequences of their actions—and are willing to take responsibility for them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted May 29, 2006 Author Share Posted May 29, 2006 May 29 – Self-Esteem Every Day If you want to learn self-responsibility, meditate on this Spanish proverb: "Take what you want," said God, "and pay for it." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellen Stuttle Posted May 30, 2006 Share Posted May 30, 2006 If you want to learn self-responsibility, meditate on this Spanish proverb: "Take what you want," said God, "and pay for it."I love that proverb, and have long considered it -- correctly interpreted -- the most succinct expression I've ever found of my own ethics. (The trick lies in ascertaining -- with clear-eyed assessment of the requirements and consequences of obtaining -- what you most truly want.)But I think the wording reads better in English translated the way I originally heard it (which was well before I learned that Nathaniel also likes it):"Take what you want," says the Lord. "And pay for it."Ellen___ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted June 1, 2006 Author Share Posted June 1, 2006 May 30 – Self-Esteem Every Day It is true that sometimes people are hit with adversities beyond their control. But those so affected are better helped when they awaken to the resources they do possess than when they are told they haven't any. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted June 1, 2006 Author Share Posted June 1, 2006 May 31 – Self-Esteem Every Day Treat people as if they are self-responsible and they will become self-responsible. Treat people as if they are helpless and they will become helpless. The secret of true kindness is to see the strength in a person that he or she does not yet recognize. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted June 2, 2006 Author Share Posted June 2, 2006 June 1– Self-Esteem Every Day Self-esteem cannot exist without self-assertiveness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted June 3, 2006 Author Share Posted June 3, 2006 June 2– Self-Esteem Every Day It is easy to misunderstand self-assertiveness and to imagine that it means pushing your way into the front of the line, being rude to waiters, acting as if no one but you has needs or rights, or always demanding to be the center of attention. Do not confuse arrogance with intelligent and appropriate self-assertiveness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted June 3, 2006 Author Share Posted June 3, 2006 June 3– Self-Esteem Every Day Self-assertiveness is the willingness to put yourself into reality—your thoughts, your feelings, your values—in appropriate ways and in appropriate contexts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted June 4, 2006 Author Share Posted June 4, 2006 June 4– Self-Esteem Every Day Self-assertiveness should not be confused with mindless rebelliousness. Self-assertiveness without consciousness is tantamount to drunk driving. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted June 6, 2006 Author Share Posted June 6, 2006 June 5– Self-Esteem Every Day To practice self-assertiveness is to live authentically, to speak and act from your innermost thoughts and feelings as a way of life—excepting, of course, the the circumstances in which you wisely choose not to do so: for example, when you are confronted by a holdup man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted June 6, 2006 Author Share Posted June 6, 2006 June 6– Self-Esteem Every Day In a class society, when you see a superior talking to an inferior, it is the inferior's eyes that are lowered. It is the slave that looks down, not the master. In the South there was a time when a black man could be beaten for the offense of daring to look at a white woman. Seeing is an act of self-assertion and has always been understood as such. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gary williams Posted June 7, 2006 Share Posted June 7, 2006 "Take what you want," said God, "and pay for it."Amen!I love that proverb, and have long considered it -- correctly interpreted -- the most succinct expression I've ever found of my own ethics. (The trick lies in ascertaining -- with clear-eyed assessment of the requirements and consequences of obtaining -- what you most truly want.)Amen Sister!Self-respecting men and women think about the consequences of their actions—and are willing to take responsibility for them.Yep! Self-esteem cannot exist without self-assertiveness.Yep!It is easy to misunderstand self-assertiveness and to imagine that it means pushing your way into the front of the line, being rude to waiters, acting as if no one but you has needs or rights, or always demanding to be the center of attention.Waiters and Waitresses love me. Why? I tip well. Why? I understand that they are working for a living. Why? Because I know what it is like to work for a living. And, I enjoy watching other people doing it too!Do not confuse arrogance with intelligent and appropriate self-assertiveness.Hello! ........SOLO!.................You hearing this?Self-assertiveness should not be confused with mindless rebelliousness. Self-assertiveness without consciousness is tantamount to drunk driving.....or tantamount to running SOLOPassion!To practice self-assertiveness is to live authentically, to speak and act from your innermost thoughts and feelings as a way of life.Yep!In a class society, when you see a superior talking to an inferior, it is the inferior's eyes that are lowered. It is the slave that looks down, not the master. In the South there was a time when a black man could be beaten for the offense of daring to look at a white woman. Seeing is an act of self-assertion and has always been understood as such.I don't look down. I like to see. I like to see through people.Seeing is an act of self-assertion and has always been understood as such.And, you can't see through the Bullshit if you don't have your head up, looking for it.Hey, this Nathanial Branden guy is pretty good!I wonder if he's ever considered writing any of this stuff down? I think he could be famous. If he applied himself! gw Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted June 8, 2006 Author Share Posted June 8, 2006 June 7– Self-Esteem Every Day If you pay someone a compliment that genuinely reflects your values, that is self-assertiveness. If you tell a friend that his or her behavior is not acceptable and you are no longer willing to tolerate it, that is also self-assertiveness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted June 9, 2006 Author Share Posted June 9, 2006 June 8– Self-Esteem Every Day If you express and aesthetic or political conviction in a group without knowing whether anyone will agree or disagree, that is self-assertiveness. So is letting people see your joy or excitement. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted June 10, 2006 Author Share Posted June 10, 2006 June 9 – Self-Esteem Every Day The willingness to let others see your vulnerability--that, too, is self-assertiveness. You refuse to fake who you are for the sake of an image. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted June 10, 2006 Author Share Posted June 10, 2006 June 10– Self-Esteem Every Day Deep and courageous self-assertiveness is letting others hear the music inside you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted June 15, 2006 Author Share Posted June 15, 2006 June 11 – Self-Esteem Every Day Self-assertiveness means treating yourself and your values with decent respect in your encounters with other human beings. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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