Ciro

Kat, Towson is only 40 minutes away from me. But, why have you chosen to have your next OL seminar in Towson? BTW, I will be very happy and honored to have all of you at my restaurant! Thanks for the compliments Fran! Ciao CD

Thank you! my friends. I really wish that you will visit me one day! Ciao CD

Love is a matter of chemistry, sex is a matter of physics. Ciro

Ellen Writes: (I think that there is homoeroticism in the relationship, despite Rand's hotly denying this) with Howard Roark and Gail Wynand: "So this is Howard Roark," Wynand thinks; "So this is Gail Wynand," Roark thinks. Ellen, I really don't see any homoeroticism in the relationship between Roark and Wynand. In Italy, for instance, is very common for a man to compliment another man for his values and good looks. Ciro

Buon Compleanno, signora Kat. Ciro

I think we are losing too much of our time on worthless discussions. Let's be concentrate on a the real issue here. http://usawakeup.org/ Ciro

I think objectivism seems to celebrate the nameless first person who discovered the fire but not those who developed extensions to and use of that insight. A great deal of human ingenuity goes into those extensions, thus, ingenuity is evolutionary, not revolutionary, and most proponent of objectivism seem not interested in the every day relative equilibrium of everyday human progress but just to the touch of class by the single individual. CD

I just cannot understand why people complain all the time. Nature gave us a brain, and in addition to that, it gave us a body that thinks faster than our brain what else do we want? Ciro

With out doubts! I would like to be Neil Amstrong. http://www.historyplace.com/sounds/step.wav

WP, I think we must learn to recognize and accept the fact that ultimately, we are alone in this world. No one can keep us safe or give us what we want. We must accept the pain of being human, of being self aware, then we might realize that loneliness is not a burden after all, but has in it the seed of new life. This is one of the message you should have gotten from Dr Branden's books. Best to you Ciro

The split wasn't more than the return-for everyone- to their natural mental balance. It had to happen, or they would have been all insane by now. Ciro

http://www.connectionnewspapers.com/articl...=62&cat=104

A very good picture of Barbara. She is certainly the best dressed at the conference. That, counts too! Ciro

Chris, he is best known for Á LA RECHERCHE DU TEMPS PERDU (Remembrance of Things Past), Ciao.

Are you saying that even people who meet the “traditional way” shouldn’t date or marry-- until they see the other face some crisis? Victor, the reason is that every man should be able to answer for one's conduct and obligations.

Barbara: in order to fully know someone, we need to see how he behaves in a crisis, when standing by his principles puts him at risk. And that is something we cannot learn from letters. This is an important observation, Barbara.

People do not die for us immediately, but remain bathed in a sort of aura of life which bears no relation to true immortality but through which they continue to occupy our thoughts in the same way as when they were alive. It is as though they were traveling abroad. ~Marcel Proust I want to extend my condolences. Ciro.

hillbilly medical terms -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Benign...... ......... .......What you be after you be eight. Bacteria.... ......... ......Back door to cafeteria. Barium...... ......... ......What doctors do when patients die. Cesarean Section....A neighborhood in Rome. Catscan..... ......... ....Searching for Kitty. Cauterize... ......... ....Made eye contact with her. Colic....... ......... .......A sheep dog. Coma........ ......... ......A punctuation mark. D&C........... ......... ....Where Washington is. Dilate...... ......... .......To live long. Enema....... ......... .....Not a friend. Fester...... ......... ......Quicker than someone else. Fibula...... ......... .......A small lie. G.I.Series.. ......... .....World Series of military baseball. Hangnail.... ......... .....What you hang your coat on. Impotent.... ......... ....Distinguishe d, well known. Labor Pain........ ......Getting hurt at work. Medical Staff....... ..A Doctor's cane. Morbid...... ......... .....A higher offer than I bid. Nitrates.... ......... .....Cheaper than day rates. Node........ ......... ......I knew it. Outpatient.. ......... ..A person who has fainted. Pap Smear....... ........A fatherhood test. Pelvis...... ......... .......Second cousin to Elvis. Post Operative... ....A letter carrier. Recovery Room......Place to do upholstery. Rectum...... ......... ...Damn near killed him. Secretion... ......... ...Hiding something Seizure..... ......... .....Roman emperor. Tablet...... ......... .....A small table. Terminal Illness..... .Getting sick at the airport. Tumor....... ......... ....More than one. Urine....... ......... .....Opposite of mine. Varicose.... ......... ....Near by/close by. __________________

No, Victor, I never had a dream woman in my life, I never thought about women that way. Ciro.

Let me state this once more for the record, that what I am discussing here has nothing to do with Angie and Victor, in fact I like them both, very much , and I wish them well. And you too Jody, I know that you have been very fortunate to have met an intelligent woman like the beautiful Lidya. I just feel sorry for Kat, the poor girl, she just didn't deserve a guy like Mike. Ciro

All of our warning mechanisms can only be put to practice when we have a physical contact with an individual. His/her mannerism will tell us a lot about the person. This is not possible when we meet someone on the internet. All we see are the words They type and what they want us to believe. That said, it is also very easy to be deceived by someone in person-in fact it happens quite often. But dealing with someone in person we stand a better chance of determining the character of the person we are meeting. The safety of our friends, family, disappears when we are on the internet, we lose the safety provided by them who can tell us that “ so and so” is a good person or someone you would be wise to stay away from. There are many successful stories of people who have met on the internet and now love each other passionately. God bless them, but Those are rare cases and not the norm. I personally would not feel comfortable, or would approve my daughter dating someone she meets on the internet. I think that the internet is the best way of communication available today between people who are interested in discussing ideas , and if they use it to find a wife because they don't have better alternatives , that's fine too. But to make it look like that it is even better than when we meet someone in person because it happened to them that way is plain BS. Ciro.

(Note from Administrator: Ciro has formal permission from NB to post this article on OL.) Valuing Love Nathaniel Branden, PhD Originally published in Personal Excellence 5/98. Reprinted by permission. Note: This essay was written in answer to the question, “How do I bring love into my life?” Published in “Handbook For The Heart,” edited by Richard Carlson and Benjamin Shield, Little, Brown and Company, New York, 1996. I do not know if there has ever been a time in history when the word love has been used so promiscuously as it is at present. We are told constantly that we must “love” everyone. Leaders of movements declare that they “love” followers they have never met. Enthusiasts of personal-growth workshops and encounter-group weekends emerge from such experiences announcing that they “love” all people everywhere. Just as a currency, in the process of becoming more and more inflated, has less and less purchasing power, so words, through an analogous process of inflation, through being used less and less discriminately, are progressively emptied of meaning. It is possible to feel benevolence and goodwill toward human beings one does not know or does not know very well. It is not possible to feel love. Aristotle made this observation twenty-five hundred years ago, and we still need to remember it. In forgetting it, all we accomplish is the destruction of the concept of love. Love by its very nature entails a process of selection, of discrimination. Love is our response to what represents our highest values. Love is a response to distinctive characteristics possessed by some beings but not by all. Otherwise, what would be the tribute of love? If love between adults does not imply admiration, if it does not imply an appreciation of traits and qualities that the recipient of love possesses, what meaning or significance would love have and why would anyone consider it desirable? In his book “The Art of Loving,” Erich Fromm wrote: “In essence, all human beings are identical. We are all part of One; we are One. This being so, it should not make any difference whom we love.” Really? If we were to ask our lovers why they care for us, consider what our reaction would be if told, “Why shouldn’t I love you? All human beings are identical. Therefore, it doesn’t make any difference whom I love. So it might as well be you.” Not very inspiring, is it? So I find the advocacy of “universal love” puzzling—if one takes words literally. Not everyone condemns sexual promiscuity, but I have never heard of anyone who hails it as an outstanding virtue. But spiritual promiscuity? Is that an outstanding virtue? Why? Is the spirit so much less important than the body? In commenting on this paradox, Ayn Rand wrote in “Atlas Shrugged”: “A morality that professes the belief that the values of the spirit are more precious than matter, a morality that teaches you to scorn a whore who gives her body indiscriminately to all men—the same morality demands that you surrender your soul in promiscuous love for all comers.” My own impression is that people who talk of “loving” everyone are, in fact, expressing a wish or a plea that everyone love them. But to take love—above all, love between adults—seriously, to treat the concept with respect and distinguish it from generalized benevolence or goodwill, is to appreciate that it is a unique experience possible between some people but not between all. Consider the case of romantic love. When two adults with significant spiritual and psychological affinities encounter each other, and if they have evolved to a decent level of maturity—if they are beyond the level of merely struggling to make their relationship “work”—then romantic love can become a pathway, not only to sexual and emotional happiness but also to higher reaches of human growth. It can become a context for a continuing encounter with the self, through the process of interaction with another self. Two consciousnesses, each dedicated to personal evolution, can provide an extraordinary stimulus and challenge to each other. But such a possibility presupposes self-esteem. The first love affair we must consummate successfully is with ourselves; only then are we ready for a relationship with another. A person who feels unworthy and unlovable is not ready for romantic love. Of course, there are other kinds of love besides romantic love. What I feel for my grandchildren is a different kind of love. What it has in common with romantic love, however, is that I see in my grandchildren values and traits that touch my heart. But it would be a corruption of language to say that I “love” my grandchildren the same as I “love” children whom I do not even know. Whatever my feelings for other children, the experience is entirely different. Apart from what I feel for my wife, Devers—who is the highest value in my life—writing is my paramount passion. What this means, practically, is that a good deal of my time and energy is devoted to writing. This has to do with living one’s values, not simply professing them. You ask, “How do I bring love into my life?” My answer is that I focus day after day principally on what I care most about in this world—on what I most respect and admire. That is what I give my time and attention to. Since my highest priorities are my marriage and my work, I give the greatest part of my time and energy to them. With regard to my wife, I frequently communicate to her my awareness of all the traits and characteristics in her that I so much love, respect, appreciate, and admire. We all want to be seen, understood, appreciated. I call this the need for the experience of psychological visibility. I strive to make my wife feel visible to me. I also spend a great deal of time thinking about the things I love. I am keenly aware of how much there is in life to appreciate and enjoy. I dwell on that every day. I do not take anything good in my life for granted. I am always aware of our mortality. I know that if I love someone, the time to express it is today. If I value something, the time to honor it is today.

I keep work and leisure separated. Are you a Penisologist?

Kat, you can always skip the wine part, it will not alter the flavor of the dish to a point of being noticed, unless one is an expert. For the wine to use...? I would suggest sherry wine, or any dry white wine. There are wines that have been fortified with brandy and sometimes flavored with herbs, roots, peels, and spices. Sherry, Madeira, Marsala, port, and vermouth are fortified wines, which are often used in cooking. Best, Ciro.