vacation to Jerusalem

[Ciro]

A man, his wife, and mother-in-law went on vacation to Jerusalem. While

they were there the mother-in-law passed away.

The undertaker told them, "You can have her shipped home for $5,000, or

you can bury her here in the Holy Land for $150."

The man thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped

home

The undertaker asked, "Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your

mother-in-law home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here and you

would spend only $150?"

The man replied, "Long ago a man died here, was buried here, and three

days later he rose from the dead......

I just can't take that chance

[Dragonfly]

Ha Ha! That reminds me of this cactus:

which they call in Germany "Schwiegermutterstuhl" = "Mother-in-law's chair".

[Michael Stuart Kelly]

(I'm still laughing, Ciro. I also liked that cactus.)

Here's a mother-in-law funeral Brazilian style:

A man was standing at a snack bar in São Paulo having a small cup of espresso in the early hours of the morning. He was surprised at the lack of traffic, since it was getting near rush hour. (São Paulo has close to 20 million inhabitants, so rush hour is brutal.)

Then he saw a funeral procession in the distance very slowly coming up the street, with a huge traffic jam behind it. In the front was a black hearse. About 10 yards behind that was another black hearse. About 10 yards behind that was a blind man with sunglasses and a seeing-eye dog. Behind him was a line of about 100 men.

Since the procession was so slow and so strange, the man became curious. When the blind man got near the snack bar, the man went out into the middle of the procession and started walking beside the blind man.

Man: Excuse me. Who is this funeral procession for? Anybody famous?

Blind Man: My wife. She is the hearse up front.

Man: I'm so sorry. What happened to her?

Blind Man: See this dog here? She accidentally fell on the dog and WOOF! The dog killed her.

(Long silence.)

Man: Excuse me once again. Who is in the second hearse?

Blind Man: My mother-in-law

Man: I'm sorry to hear that. What happened to her?

Blind Man: When she saw her daughter being attacked by the dog, she jumped in and WOOF! The dog killed her too.

(Long silence.)

Man: Could I borrow your dog after the funeral?

Blind Man: Get in line.