The Boneless Chicken Wings Controversy

Michael Stuart Kelly

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The Boneless Chicken Wings Controversy

I started watching this video for the humor of it.

And now I look in the mirror and stare amazed at what I see.

This guy made sense to me.


I agree with him.

I have no idea why chicken breast meat started being called boneless chicken wings. I'm sure there's a story here.

As for me, I have never ordered boneless chicken wings. I have never eaten one knowingly.

They never interested me because there is so little meat on chicken wings to begin with, I couldn't imagine how deboning them would make them more attractive or interesting. 

Maybe it's because I spent 32 years of my life in Brazil and not here in the USA, but, at times, I have difficulty with terms like this. For example, I had to wrestle with the term "chicken fried steak" for the longest time before I understood what that was.

I always thought boneless chicken wings were made out of... you know... chicken wings. But they never looked right according to my expectations, so I've had cognitive dissonance every time I've looked at the pictures and seen this term. That's why I never ordered them. Something felt off.

At least now I know what bothered me all this time. Boneless chicken wings are not chicken wings at all. They are chicken breast meat and simply called boneless chicken wings.


I'm glad that's cleared up.


I'm trying to be light, but I'm serious. 


What's this country turning into?


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3 hours ago, Jules Troy said:

Burgerless burgers?


Well, Burger King did come out with the Impossible Burger. Looked like meat. Tasted like meat. Was not meat.

This reminds me of a book I read ages ago by Kurt Vonnegut, Cat's Cradle. He was lampooning the way politicians say one thing and what always happens is another. But that was all in the subtext. On the surface, there were things like a person who kept making a cat's cradle, that child's thing where they manipulate string between two hands. 

One person in the novel (I don't remember who since it was so long ago--and I'm not going to look it up right now :) ) said there was a big problem with the cat's cradle:

"No damn cat. No damn cradle."


Now we have no damn wings. No damn burger.



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