Fran

A PUPPY! I didn't know there was a puppy in the room during that talk! I would have been fawning all over it! What kind? What sex?

Judith

A Border Terrier dog called Kai. He was very cute. I said hello and had a good stroke.

Darn it Judith, we could have worked together on this. You could have distracted Leigh whilst I swiped the puppy and stuffed it in my bag!!

Marital arts?

I can see it. The plot keeps thickening until the guard scene. Then there is a 15 minute martial arts fight, but that would have to include Dagny beating the guard and getting into the torture chamber where Galt is, and Hank Rearden, Francisco, Ragnar and others come swinging in through the windows dressed as Ninjas or something and fighting a whole bunch of guards with machine guns and stuff.

That'll knock 'em dead!

Maybe they could also put in an exciting car chase somewhere, too.

Michael

(Hey! Stop that! Just joking...)

LOL!

Ohmygod! I hope the producers don't read this post. You'll put ideas into their heads...

Phil,

Playing by Heart is a great place to start appreciating Angelina Jolie as an actor. It's a really good movie, little seen by just about everyone. As I said above, she's amazing in Alexander, making you actually believe that she's Colin Ferrell's psychotic mother. She's got a hell of a range, actually, she's just a huge celebrity and has become unfortunately associated with a character from a video game.

Kevin,

I'm heartened hearing this, as I was concerned about AJ having the acting skills to give Dagny the authenticity, power and vulnearability that I would have been looking for in the part. She does seem to be an actress who will pull the crowds in, which is hugely important.

If it wasn't AJ, I'm not sure who I would choose. I quite like Christina Ricci, and although she doesn't 'fit' for Dagny, she would probably play a good Cheryl.

Fran

Thank you Chris, your saying this met my need for visibility

Roger,

I'm delighted that you and Becky are so in love. And I will second Barbara's appreciative comments about her.

From a personal viewpoint: it heartens me to hear from people who have been married for 17 years and still feel so much love for each other, as I didn't experience this from my parents' relationship whilst growing up. From a world view: happy, fulfilled, in love people, make for a happier world to be in

Fran

Hello Everybody

I found this article in one of my sister's magazines, that I really enjoyed reading and which made a lot of sense to me. Yeah, sure there are bits that I may not agree with completely, but that doesn't mean I have to throw the baby out with the bathwater. So, I thought I'd share it with you all

The Lost Art of Being Happy.

If you think you can only be content when all your worries have disappeared, you’re wrong. Tony Wilkinson explains how you can learn to be happy now.

Are you the happiest person you know? Not necessarily the riches, or most successful just the happiest? If not, why not? Most people will reel off their current worries – the job, the kids, the car the price of fish. I don’t’ mean to sweep these aside, problems need to be solved if possible, or waited out until they disappear. But as far as living happily is concerned, you have to face a crucial fact. If you can only live happily after all your problems are solved, you are never going to live happily, because when today’s problems are gone and forgotten others will take their place. So either living happily is just impossible or you have to do it in spite of your problems.

I worked for twenty years as an investment specialist among some very rich and powerful people. They had all the playthings they could wish for, but surprisingly few seemed any happier than less fortunate folk. Why?

When I left this was my starting point for what proved to be a long enquiry. I’m working on a book called Spirituality for Sceptics (published by Findhorn Press next summer), which picks up the idea that cultivating the inner life amounts to spirituality and whether or not you believe in a religion, it leads to happiness. Six years of philosophy at university (I like to think of myself as a freelance philosopher) and a lifelong interest in different religions shaped my approach. The explanation I found runs like a thread through centuries of thinking about happiness, though often obscured by other concerns.

Happiness is based on skills and therefore can be learned. The implications for the way we live are significant. We could learn to be happier and teach our children to be happy. Happiness doesn’t depend on external circumstances, happiness depends on your inner life. Happiness is about how you react inwardly to events, what you think and what you believe, how you feel, how problems affect you. It may sound obvious but like most obvious things it is often forgotten when it matters most. We focus almost exclusively on getting and spending and having fun, and then wonder why we are not happy. But it’s when our inner lives are tranquil that we are happiest and we call this inner peace.

Yoga and philosophy can help, but only if they have a positive impact on your inner life. The difficulty is that inner life is based on patterns and habits – some you were born with, most you have acquired. You don’t choose occasion by occasion how you respond inside to events. This happens and you feel angry; that happens and you feel sad; you pass the patisserie and you feel hungry; you hear a tune or smell a certain scent and it reminds you of a particular time or person… Things produce a response without you thinking about it or choosing how you feel, and they don’t necessarily leave you with inner peace. So the trick is to break the pattern. You can’t completely avoid problems, but you can change how you react to them by acquiring new habits that provoke peaceful inner responses.

There are four basic reasons why our inner lives can stop us living happily; habits of thought, belief, emotion and desire. Take, for example an emotion such as anger. It’s hard to be angry and happy at the same time, so whenever you are angry you are not happy. Thus training yourself to get angry less often would really help. It’s not a matter of biting back anger, but of gradually training yourself not to get angry so easily.

Most people are unhappy because of preconceptions that they hold about themselves or others, such as, ‘I could never do that’ (even though you might with practice) and ‘Everyone’s more confident than me’ (or perhaps just better bluffing than you). If we had the skills to change these assumptions we would be much happier.

Training your inner life into different habits requires learning skills of thinking, feeling and managing your beliefs and desires. Think of them as skills rather than virtues, you benefit from an important and liberating shift.

Instead of, “I must become a better person, you can think ‘I would live more happily if I worked on my skills.’ So the change in attitude becomes a choice, not a duty. And I’ve added an extra set of enjoyment skills. It’s not something you can do overnight – it’s a whole new way of life, but the reward is what we all want most -happiness. There are five main skills you need to cultivate.

Mindfulness. Borrowed from Buddhism, this involves developing your ability to focus your thoughts in the present. The problem most of us with thought is having too much of it – the worrying and non-stop mental ‘chattering’ our minds are prone to. Concentrating on your breathing is one way to practise – observing it closely is enough, although surprisingly hard. But many people achieve the same focus through activities such as yoga, sport dance or martial arts. I have a friend who does it by racing bikes down mountains; slightly mad, perhaps, but he mind doesn’t get a chance to wander.

Mindfulness is a key inner skill because as it gets stronger, it lets you focus on your own inner life and catch your habits in the act. Once you can see how you are ruled by them, the change you are seeking often happens of its own accord.

Compassion. Most religions rightly stress compassion, but ‘goodness’ isn’t the point here. As well as being a virtue in its own right it is a practical skill that counteracts negative emotions such as anger and hatred, which are terrible wreckers of happiness. Try it the next time someone annoys you: put yourself in their place and ask yourself what they might be thinking and feeling to behave like that. Even ‘bad’ people let alone people who just mildly annoy you, often have a warped or mistaken view of the world that makes them do what they do. Wars are started or minorities are persecuted because someone decides its what God wants, or that the minority is somehow a threat. It doesn’t mean that they should get away with their actions, but if you can get into the habit of thinking more tolerantly – by understanding that actions are also ruled by inner habits – you’ll find that you can react with less anger. And less anger means more happiness for you: it’s not about them. And as a bonus, you might find you can react to provocation more effectively, maybe persuade the other person to behave differently, because you won’t be undermined with negative emotions.

Story Skills. These are very useful for problems with your inner belief system, as they let you stand back and explore alternative versions of reality. Beliefs have great power over your life because beliefs are something that you take as fact. Start to think of your beliefs as stories, and it is easier to accept that other things might be true as well, or even instead of. True stories only select the little bit of reality we are focusing on at that moment: no one story is the whole truth about any situation. From a different point of view we would see another story, sometimes as a whole different world. This is not about make-believe, it’s about reframing situations to look at them from a different perspective. If I break my leg it’s no use pretending I haven’t, but what else is true? What opportunities does it bring? Maybe I need to learn to accept help, or catch up on whatever usually gets crowded out of my life, whether it’s family time or the reading I meant to do. The skill of looking for different perspectives and stories is the basis of some very successful therapies, and it is also powerful in everyday life.

Letting Go Techniques. These are particularly helpful when we are unhappy or not getting what we want. Generally, we are encouraged – by advertising for example – to keep wanting and to think that more will make us happier, whether it’s clothes or cars or even love. But wanting is a treadmill: as long as you have unsatisfied desires you won’t be at peace, so to be happy you either have to satisfy all your desires (unlikely), or let go of some of them. One of the best ways to practice letting go is to do without for short periods: many religions have times of fasting partly for this reason. If the need for something is making you unhappy, work on letting go of that need. Letting-go skills also include forgiveness, which helps hugely if you think you want revenge.

Enjoyment skills. [Focus on what is right rather than what is wrong. Be optimistic.] This last group includes skills such as patience, humour and especially gratitude. You don’t have to be grateful to someone, it’s enough to cultivate gratitude for things. Our minds naturally scan our environment for dangers and resources, a useful mechanism when we were hunter-gatherers. But it can make us unnecessarily pessimistic – focusing on the ten per cent we lack rather than the 90 per cent we have. Cultivating enjoyment skills will help redress the balance. The plain fact is that you will get stuck in queues, you will get aches and pains and you will get older. Bad stuff happens. If you dwell on how bad it is you only compound the problem: the skill is to look instead for enjoyment in that moment, however well hidden. For example, when you are stuck in traffic breathe deeply and slowly and enjoy the sensation of just breathing, of being alive. Look around and find one thing that’s beautiful, one that’s funny and one that touches you. It puts your impatience into perspective.

Acquiring all these skills takes time and effort. If I listed all the strokes in tennis, you would not expect to win Wimbledon by learning that list. The important thing is to proactive them until they operate without you thinking about them. Your practice routine will be very individual, because everyone needs to prioritise different skills that are holding them back from being happy, but keep the skills in mind and you constantly find new ways to try them out. This way of living is sa path between religion and materialism. You don’t have to give up your existing path to tread the path, but you don’t’ have to adopt a new faith either.

Spirituality for Sceptics by Tony Wilkinson, published by Findhorn Press in 2007.

Taken from You magazine, 15 October 2006, pages 53-57. I couldn't see anything about copyright.

Hear, hear! Star you are, Roger

I too would like to acknowledge the clarity and understanding I gain from reading your posts.

I also really love the quote at the end of your posts.

Hi Victor

My internet access is patchy at the moment, which is why I've not had chance to post much. Hope to get back into posting regularly in a few weeks time. I miss talking to everybody

Fran

The UK Libertarian Alliance are holding their annual weekend conference in London on Saturday 25 and Sunday 26 November 2006. Cost is £85 for the weekend to include the banquet on Saturday night. Most of the attendees are familiar with AR and O'ism and quite a few of them are O'ists.

http://www.libertarian.co.uk/

Ooh, me too - I also love discussions like this one.

Roger, I'm intrigued by your evaluation of Rand as an INFJ. At first I was sceptical, but after having re-read a profile for INFJ - it does fit to some extent.

Judith, with regard to your comments about NFs not wanting to hurt people's feelings; I would say that as an NF this brings me a lot of turmoil. I don't want to hurt people's feelings, but frequently do, and often this is in response to what I perceive as their lack of consideration for my feelings. Harsh treatment puts me under stress and I react differently when under stress than I would do normally. With people who are compassionate towards me, I am compassionate towards them.

Back to assessing Rand's profile. I understand that one way to unravel somebody's type is to see how they react when stressed, so I'm curious to see how this translates for AR. Here's something I copied off the web (emphasis mine):

http://www.discoveryourpersonality.com/new...chor-INFJ-32127

"One common way to tell that INFJs are feeling stressed is when they limit their options to just one. They might insist there is only one solution to a problem. Others become extremely critical or angry, often blaming people for their troubles. Some INFJs accuse other people of failing to help, while some will make even the simplest task unnecessarily complex. There can be paradoxical behavior: some INFJs might extravert a great deal, saying harsh things with little regard for the feelings of others. In contrast, some INFJs can become rather introspective and shut themselves off from the world or outside help. Still other INFJs set unrealistic goals for themselves, which just makes matters worse. Finally, some INFJs might eat or drink too much.

What are possible stressors for INFJs? Well, being forced to learn or retain vast amounts of detailed information can often have that affect. Being around too many people, particularly those whom the INFJ considers shallow can be stressful. If the INFJ feels like he or she is under great critical scrutiny, they can feel overwhelmed. Finally, if people are underappreciated or emotional charged conflict is not resolved, INFJs can feel stressed."

Another site suggests that INFJs under stress can be compulsive and hypercritical, becoming obsessed with detail and go over and over an issue without making headway [not pasted here due to copyright].

From reading MYWAR - the hypercritical does sound like Rand, it seems she did make a lot of harsh comments with little regard for people's feelings, and NB mentioned how they would discuss either his psychology endlessly, or the 'state of the nation' without resolution.

Comparing to INTJs under stress:

http://www.geocities.com/tokyo/Island/6653/intj.htm#badfit

INTJ Under Stress

Under great stress, people tend to "snap" and "flip" over to their non-preferred style. For INTJs this means:

Overindulges in Sensing activities -- eating, watching TV,

Becomes overly focused on their environment -- housecleaning, organizing cupboards

Which doesn't sound at all like Ayn Rand! Nowhere in MYWAR do I recall NB talking about Rand's obsessive tidying - she barely remembered to feed herself or Frank.

It does also talk about INTJs in a bad fit:

INTJ in a Bad Fit

If INTJs find themselves in a frustrating work situation where their contributions and talents are not used or not appreciated, they may:

Become aloof and abrupt, processing internally

Be critical of those who do not see their vision

The latter sounds like Rand, but not so much the former.

I've checked the above on another site with similar results (scroll down to bottom for information on reactions to stress):

http://www.teamtechnology.co.uk/mb-types/intj.htm

http://www.teamtechnology.co.uk/mb-types/infj.htm

Looking at AR's profile under stress, adds weight to your ascertion, Roger, that Rand was an INFJ and not an INTJ - this surprises me as I was so sure that she was an INTJ.

Well, as I've just realised that TV is included I'm going to put the sci-fi TV programme, Dr Who, as my all-time favourite. This season's was the best yet, although alas it has now finished. What I particularly liked about this series, was that the Doctor (an alien species) really championed the human race, subtly exposed religion for using scare tactics, and via the Cybermen showed the importance of consciousness and individuality.

I used to watch it from behind the sofa when I was kid - progressing to watching it from behind a cushion when I became braver. I'm glad that the new series is still immensely enjoyable for me as an adult - I can no longer watch the old series as the special effects are way too outdated.

I have a confession to make: at age 32, I still watch 'the scary bits' from behind a cushion ;)

As you can probably guess, I don't go to see horror movies - I end up never seeing any of it!

Hi Ross

I hear your dislike of being 'pigeonholed' and would like your individuality to be more taken into account by these questionnaires? I have experienced dislike of these personality type indicators in the past, too, for similar reasons. I think part of my frustration stemmed from the fact that we are all unique and far more complex than can be explained in just a page or two of a personality profile.

If this is something that would be of interest to you, you may find that reading the explanations for each profile provides you with useful insights. I found it particularly helpful to read the Keirsey Temperaments - it gave me clarity as to why, as an NF (INFP or Healer as Keirsey calls them), I felt like such an alien growing up in an SJ household.

Here's a link if you are interested and the temparements I'm referring to are listed down the left hand side:

http://www.keirsey.com/

Warmly,

Fran

Hi Kat

I usually buy stuff from either Amazon.co.uk or the Book Depository. I have a preference for the Book Depository as they don't charge for shipping and seem to have more Objectivist books in stock.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/browse.html/202...023?node=468294

http://www.bookdepository.co.uk/WEBSITE/WW...ES/homepage.php

Do either of these help?

Thank you for the link, which I'll check out.

Fran

This was emailed to me.

This was written originally by Frances Stonor Saunders.

Frances Stonor Saunders is the former arts editor of The New Statesman,

author of The Cultural Cold War, Diabolical Englishman and The Devil's

Broker and was awarded the Royal Historical Society's William Gladstone

Memorial Prize. She lives in London. It is well worth reading and if you

wish to, please pass it on to as many people as you can.

"You may have heard that legislation creating compulsory ID Cards

passed a crucial stage in the House of Commons. You may feel that ID

cards are not something to worry about, since we already have Photo ID

for our Passport and Driving License and an ID Card will be no different to

that. What you have not been told is the full scope of this proposed ID

Card, and what it will mean to you personally.

The proposed ID Card will be different from any card you now hold. It will

be connected to a database called the NIR, (National Identity Register),

where all of your personal details will be stored. This will include the

unique number that will be issued to you, your fingerprints, a scan of the

back of your eye, and your photograph. Your name, address and date of

birth will also obviously be stored there.

There will be spaces on this database for your religion, residence status,

and many other private and personal facts about you. There is unlimited

space for every other details of your life on the NIR database, which can

be expanded by the Government with or without further Acts of Parliament.

By itself, you might think that this register is harmless, but you would be

wrong to come to this conclusion. This new card will be used to check

your identity against your entry in the register in real time, whenever you

present it to 'prove who you are'.

Every place that sells alcohol or cigarettes, every post office, every

pharmacy, and every Bank will have an NIR Card Terminal, (very much like

the Chip and Pin Readers that are everywhere now) into which your card

can be 'swiped' to check your identity. Each time this happens, a record

is made at the NIR of the time and place that the Card was presented.

This means for example, that there will be a government record of every

time you withdraw more than £99 at your branch of NatWest, who now

demand ID for these transactions. Every time you have to prove that you

are over 18, your card will be swiped, and a record made at the NIR.

Restaurants and off licenses will demand that your card is swiped so that

each receipt shows that they sold alcohol to someone over 18, and that

this was proved by the access to the NIR, indemnifying them from

prosecution.

Private businesses are going to be given access to the NIR Database. If

you want to apply for a job, you will have to present your card for a swipe.

If you want to apply for a London Underground Oyster Card, or a

supermarket loyalty card, or a driving license you will have to present your

ID Card for a swipe. The same goes for getting a telephone line or a

mobile phone or an internet account.

Oyster, DVLA, BT and Nectar (for example) all run very detailed databases

of their own. They will be allowed access to the NIR, just as every other

business will be. This means that each of these entities will be able to

store your unique number in their database, and place all your travel,

phone records, driving activities and detailed shopping habits under your

unique NIR number. These databases, which can easily fit on a storage

device the size of your hand, will be sold to third parties either legally or

illegally. It will then be possible for a non-governmental entity to create a

detailed dossier of all your activities. Certainly, the government will have

clandestine access to all of them, meaning that they will have a complete

record of all your movements, from how much and when you withdraw from

your bank account to what medications you are taking, down to the level

of what sort of bread you eat - all accessible via a single unique number in

a central database.

This is quite a significant leap from a simple ID Card that shows your

name and face.

Most people do not know that this is the true character and scope of the

proposed ID Card. Whenever the details of how it will work are explained

to them, they quickly change from being ambivalent towards it.

The Government is going to COMPEL you to enter your details into the

NIR and to carry this card. If you and your children want to obtain or

renew your passports, you will be forced to have your fingerprints taken

and your eyes scanned for the NIR, and an ID Card will be issued to you

whether you want one or not. If you refuse to be fingerprinted and eye

scanned, you will not be able to get a passport. Your ID Card will, just

like your passport, not be your property. The Home Secretary will have

the right to revoke or suspend your ID at any time, meaning that you will

not be able to withdraw money from your Bank Account, for example, or

do anything that requires you to present your government issued ID Card.

The arguments that have been put forwarded in favour of ID Cards can be

easily disproved. ID Cards WILL NOT stop terrorists; every Spaniard has

a compulsory ID Card as did the Madrid Bombers, and probably most of

the 9/11 criminals. ID Cards will not 'eliminate benefit fraud', which in

comparison, is small compared to the astronomical cost of this proposal,

which will be measured in billions according to the LSE (London School of

Economics). This scheme exists solely to exert total surveillance and

control over the ordinary free British Citizen, and it will line the pockets of

the companies that will create the computer systems at the expense of

your freedom, privacy and money.

If you did not know the full scope of the proposed ID Card Scheme before

and you are as unsettled as I am at what it really means to you, to this

country and its way of life, I urge you to email or photocopy this and give it

to your friends and colleagues and everyone else you think should know

and who cares. The Bill has proceeded to this stage due to the lack of

accurate and complete information on this proposal being made public.

Together and hand in hand, we can inform the entire nation if everyone who

receives this passes it on."

This message has nothing to do with Politics - it is to do with our freedom.

But it is the Politicians that in ignorance will vote for the ID card and thus

move us closer to the Police State that seems to be the aim of our current

Government. Please pass this message on - and use your vote next

General Election to get rid of the people who wish to destroy our cherished

democracy.

Kat, are there sufficient UK members to make a UK link worthwhile? I would like to support OL this way, but shipping costs make it prohibitive for me.

Three cheers for Kat - hip, hip, hurray! Hip, hip, hurray! Hip, hip, hurray !

I too would like to express my appreciation for this site: the aesthetics, content and friendly people make it an all round pleasure to read and post to. So huge thanks to Kat and Micheal for having the foresight to set it up.

Ohmygod. That is so very tragic. One must wonder at how desperate and powerless these people must feel. Only people who hate themselves would want to blow themselves up - more so if they want their own children to kill themselves. I guess the boy who refused had some inkling of self-esteem left.

What saddens me, is they don't realise that building self-esteem, rather than self-hate in their society, is what will really help them.

I also consider dogs to be an essential part of my life, and I'm willing to put up with an incredible amount of inconvenience to have them there. They ARE a big responsibility, and I believe that in the UK, there are insane quarantine requirements if you're travelling -- something like 9 months if a dog is brought into the country. I wouldn't even consider moving there while my dogs are still living for that reason.

Judith, just so you know, in case you ever decide to come travelling to the UK with your dogs - the quarantine laws have been replaced with doggy passports, microchipping (the dogs - they've not quite started doing that kind of thing to humans yet) and rabies vaccinations. The microchips are used instead of photos - which is sensible as I think customs would have a hard time distinguishing between all those yellow labradors...

There are lots of Americans and Europeans who bring their dogs to show at Crufts every year. Although you don't have to show your dogs, to be able to take them.

'Gut and Psychology Syndrome' is a very interesting book that I'm reading at the moment by Dr. Natasha Campbell-McBride MD. MMedSci(Neurology). MMedSci(Nutrition). She is the mother of an autistic child herself and she runs a private clinic in Cambridge, UK treating children with autism.

Her theory is that psychological disorders such as schizophrenia, autism, depression, dipolar disorder, ADHD, ADD, dyslexia, etc are linked to pathogenic gut flora and resulting poor immunity. Sounds totally implausible doesn't it?

I'm writing this from memory, so I'm not going to be as comprehensive as I would like. One simple example is that pathogenic yeast in the gut such as Candida albicans convert gluten from the diet into opiates, which cross the blood-brain barrier, and it is these opiates in the brain that cause the symptoms of schizophrenia. Remove the grains that the yeast feeds on, rid the body of the Candida overgrowth (some resides there naturally), use diet to add normal gut flora and provide the body with the nutrients that it needs and the schizophrenia symptoms go.

She explains her theory of the cause for autism as well, but I'll have to add it later.

Poor gut flora comes from a diet of processed foods, not being breast-fed, contraceptive pill, chronic stress, and is passed via breast-milk to the newborn infant - so if the mother has poor gut flora she passes it on to the baby.

In her clinic she mainly uses diet which is designed to remove pathogenic gut flora, heal a leaky gut which leaks toxins into the body and replace it with healthy flora. There are other factors involved and she doesn't claim that it's an easy or quick 'fix'. She advises removing all processed foods, starchy vegetables such as potatoes and yams, sugar, milk and most dairy products and all grains from the diet. Leaving all meats, fish, some cheeses, live yoghurt, most fruit and vegetables in the diet.

I met her and she did look incredibly healthy herself - I know it sounds cliched - but she glowed from within.

Here's an Amazon.co.uk link to the book if anybody is interested:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Gut-Psychology-Syn...a/dp/0954852001

I'm fairly convinced by her theory, but I also know that I want to believe her - because I want these kind of disorders to be curable through diet - so this may be clouding my judgement. As I have gullibly fallen for things like this in the past, I am now a wary sceptic, but she does explain herself well (better than I have done here). I would like to read the papers she quotes at the back and see evidence for the results before I'm completely convinced though.

I'd like to hear what anybody thinks to this? (I'm curious to see people's reactions.) I can give a more comprehensive view of her findings if people want to hear them, particularly on autism, as I know that there are autism posts.

Wow! My internet access is patchy and short at the moment so I haven't been able to post as often as I would like. I'm glad that I was able to check OL today - I do miss you all!!!! I really enjoyed reading everybody's posts and it's funny that for the past few months I've been feeling strangely broody ;) However, I think this is partly down to my ticking clock (I'm nearly 33 and they do advise to have kids before age 35), but mainly I think that it's the needs I'm trying to fill. I'm looking for meaning in my life and this is a most pressing need - having children would be ONE strategy for fulfilling this need. Once I became aware of what my need was - my broodiness waned. I'm thinking of better strategies for meeting this need - mostly considering my career and the contribution that I want to make in the world.

I have a nephew and a niece and I enjoy being with them, but I have to say that I'm glad that they're not mine. I love being able to have my space whenever I want it. My sister also has a Wiemaraner puppy called Flo, and she has made me realise how much I desperately miss having a dog in my life. So much so that I want to plan my life to be in a position to have one. (At the moment it's not practical as I live part of the time in UK and part of the time in Cyrpus.) It's interesting that I'm willing to do what is necessary in order to get a dog, as getting one is hugely important to me, but it would feel like a sacrifice if I was to do it in order to have children.

What I'm eternally grateful for, is that I live in a time when contraception makes choosing not to have children an option.

Narfa posted a photo:

Joe and Tom

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Alex, Lindsay and Mike

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Shawn, Felicia and ?

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Kay, Christopher and Felicia

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