Looking for Home School Book Suggestions

[anonrobt]

Hello, all!

I am new to this forum (thanks for referring me here Donovan!), and was very happy to see that there was a subforum on parenting. This is something I have not seen in other Objectivist forums I have visited, but have been searching for.

Background: My husband and I have 5 kids, ages 7 to 18. Our 18 year old started college in January, and 3 of our children are in public schools. We recently pulled our 9 year old out of public school to educate her at home. While the elementary school here is pretty good (by public school standards) we felt in her case the negatives at school outweighed the positives. She was diagnosed with Asperger's several months ago, and although she has progressed in some areas (she is in speech therapy, and does fairly well academically and has been in the schools "gifted" program for a few years), the overwhelming social aspects just sucked the life out of her, and as well as some of the home work assignments. It got to a point where I was spending very little time with my other kids as I had to help her deal with the "drama" of social issues at school, and in many cases homework. There are other issues to related to her Aspeger's, but I think I have outlined the basic reasons we decided to pull her out.

Anyway, we are using a math curriculum that is pretty good so far (Singapore Math) - she adores math and that and art are her strong points. I also have some decent text and work books for grammar, and we have put together a rough outline of what we will be teaching her for science and history using various books, dvds, etc.

In putting together her curricula, I have used some guidelines based on a classical education, as well as trying to keep in mind the proper hierarchy (Lisa VanDamme had a good article about this I believe in the Spring 2006 issue of the Objective Standard). As we study the big bang theory, we are also reading different stories of creation based on various cultural mythologies (biblical, Greek, Egyptian, etc.) So far she has really enjoyed what she has read and is learning.

Here is what I am looking for - suggestions on books you think are compatible with Objectivist philosophy for her free reading and assigned reading. Right now, she feels like she has run out of books hahah - that is because she wanted to jump ahead and read a bunch of books that we had. We have a ton of books - a lot of sci/fi - some that are appropriate for her age level, and a lot that is not. She even tried to read Animal Farm a few weeks ago, but I suggested we wait on that one. We have all the Harry Potter Books (though not sure if one could consider them Objectivist - myself and most of my other kids have enjoyed them), "The Girl Who Owned A City"....but I am looking for more suggestions.

Besides math and art, my daughter is absolutely obsessed with cats. For xmas I gave her an Encyclopedia of Cat Breeds and she goes through it constantly.

So - what do you buy your kids?

Edited to add: While she has not read Anthem yet, she has listened to it on CD.

Never underestimate the possibility of how much understanding a youngster can get from an interested book, even Animal Farm... I was reading Carl Sandburg's six volume Lincoln bio when 10... 'age level' is actually whatever complexity they can muster, and it varies tremendously, especially if they're interested... you mention having lots of Sci/fi, but while that means Heinlein, does it include James Hogan, Eric Frank Russell, Robert Forward, L. Neil Smith, the early F. Paul Wilson, Barry Longyear [Circus World books], Melinda Snodgrass' Circuit trilogy, Vernor Vinge, Charles Sheffield, and the old classics of Burroughs, Fletcher, Platt, Weinbaum, and Hal Clement... tho male oriented, as most books are, what of Robert Louis Stevenson or even the Sherlock Holmes tales... ever read Inkheart? or the original Nancy Drew series [before they corrupted her in 'modernizing' her].... just a few to mention - many of these are outright libertarian or at least self-reliant and personal responsibility oriented...

[SherryTX]

Here is what I am looking for - suggestions on books you think are compatible with Objectivist philosophy for her free reading and assigned reading. Right now, she feels like she has run out of books hahah - that is because she wanted to jump ahead and read a bunch of books that we had. We have a ton of books - a lot of sci/fi - some that are appropriate for her age level, and a lot that is not. She even tried to read Animal Farm a few weeks ago, but I suggested we wait on that one. We have all the Harry Potter Books (though not sure if one could consider them Objectivist - myself and most of my other kids have enjoyed them), "The Girl Who Owned A City"....but I am looking for more suggestions.

Besides math and art, my daughter is absolutely obsessed with cats. For xmas I gave her an Encyclopedia of Cat Breeds and she goes through it constantly.

So - what do you buy your kids?

Edited to add: While she has not read Anthem yet, she has listened to it on CD.

Help your daughter to run with her strengths, which you indicate are math and art and cats (Siamese I hope). Developing her intellect is the number one task she has and learning how to be comfortable with her differences from the Neurologically Typical world is what she needs. She is Different and that is the fact. It were well if she regarded her Difference as a gift rather than a problem. If she goes brains first in the world, you don't have to worry too much if she is a mini-Objectivist. Very smart fact obsessed people tend to evolve into some sort of rational egoism. I did it on my own before I even knew Ayn Rand existed.

Aspies (those on the Asperger Spectrum) tend to be self absorbed from the git go, so you needn't worry over much about your daughter becoming an Altruist or a Kantian. Aspies tend to drill into facts so they are well connected to external reality, more so than Normals. If your child goes to adulthood knowing that her condition is a blessing more than a problem, she should be alright.

You are probably right in home schooling her while she is emotionally vulnerable. At a public school (or even a private school) they will try to bang an odd shape Aspie peg into a trivially symmetric Normal hole. If being an Aspergarian produced a reproductive advantage (it does not) the Aspies would be the next evolutionary step for the human race by way of Darwinian Natural Selection. People like your daughter and I are the Alphas. We have to learn to live with the Betas and still not lose our edge.

Go forth and help your daughter do mighty things. She and you are blessed.

Ba'al Chatzaf

Thanks - I have found that a lot of what you have stated here is true already. While the social aspects can sometimes feel like a curse for her, the other characteristics of being an Aspie definitely seem to be a huge plus for her.

We just told her what Asperger's is about 2 weeks ago. We hadn't labeled it before because we wanted to focus on her getting some things situated. She already knew she was different - or unique in her words. It was funny because she was in the room when we explained what it was to our 7 year old, and Rebecca piped up and said (in a humorous way) "don't worry you cannot catch it" hahah. She already accepted she was different than most kids in her school and her siblings long before we ever got a diagnosis. That is a relief to me, because to her it just IS and she doesn't appear to think it makes her less worthy than other kids (which has been a concern for me).

She loves all cats by the way, hahah.

[SherryTX]

Hello, all!

I am new to this forum (thanks for referring me here Donovan!), and was very happy to see that there was a subforum on parenting. This is something I have not seen in other Objectivist forums I have visited, but have been searching for.

Background: My husband and I have 5 kids, ages 7 to 18. Our 18 year old started college in January, and 3 of our children are in public schools. We recently pulled our 9 year old out of public school to educate her at home. While the elementary school here is pretty good (by public school standards) we felt in her case the negatives at school outweighed the positives. She was diagnosed with Asperger's several months ago, and although she has progressed in some areas (she is in speech therapy, and does fairly well academically and has been in the schools "gifted" program for a few years), the overwhelming social aspects just sucked the life out of her, and as well as some of the home work assignments. It got to a point where I was spending very little time with my other kids as I had to help her deal with the "drama" of social issues at school, and in many cases homework. There are other issues to related to her Aspeger's, but I think I have outlined the basic reasons we decided to pull her out.

Anyway, we are using a math curriculum that is pretty good so far (Singapore Math) - she adores math and that and art are her strong points. I also have some decent text and work books for grammar, and we have put together a rough outline of what we will be teaching her for science and history using various books, dvds, etc.

In putting together her curricula, I have used some guidelines based on a classical education, as well as trying to keep in mind the proper hierarchy (Lisa VanDamme had a good article about this I believe in the Spring 2006 issue of the Objective Standard). As we study the big bang theory, we are also reading different stories of creation based on various cultural mythologies (biblical, Greek, Egyptian, etc.) So far she has really enjoyed what she has read and is learning.

Here is what I am looking for - suggestions on books you think are compatible with Objectivist philosophy for her free reading and assigned reading. Right now, she feels like she has run out of books hahah - that is because she wanted to jump ahead and read a bunch of books that we had. We have a ton of books - a lot of sci/fi - some that are appropriate for her age level, and a lot that is not. She even tried to read Animal Farm a few weeks ago, but I suggested we wait on that one. We have all the Harry Potter Books (though not sure if one could consider them Objectivist - myself and most of my other kids have enjoyed them), "The Girl Who Owned A City"....but I am looking for more suggestions.

Besides math and art, my daughter is absolutely obsessed with cats. For xmas I gave her an Encyclopedia of Cat Breeds and she goes through it constantly.

So - what do you buy your kids?

Edited to add: While she has not read Anthem yet, she has listened to it on CD.

Never underestimate the possibility of how much understanding a youngster can get from an interested book, even Animal Farm... I was reading Carl Sandburg's six volume Lincoln bio when 10... 'age level' is actually whatever complexity they can muster, and it varies tremendously, especially if they're interested... you mention having lots of Sci/fi, but while that means Heinlein, does it include James Hogan, Eric Frank Russell, Robert Forward, L. Neil Smith, the early F. Paul Wilson, Barry Longyear [Circus World books], Melinda Snodgrass' Circuit trilogy, Vernor Vinge, Charles Sheffield, and the old classics of Burroughs, Fletcher, Platt, Weinbaum, and Hal Clement... tho male oriented, as most books are, what of Robert Louis Stevenson or even the Sherlock Holmes tales... ever read Inkheart? or the original Nancy Drew series [before they corrupted her in 'modernizing' her].... just a few to mention - many of these are outright libertarian or at least self-reliant and personal responsibility oriented...

I don't recognize many of the authors you have listed so thanks. My husband is a die hard Burroughs fan, and we have numerous books by him. We do have some of the older Nancy Drew books as well (I agree - I don't like some of the modern ones.) I enjoyed Stevenson and Holmes growing up as well and we have some works by both authors. Rebecca started to read Animal farm, but set it aside because it was a little too much for her. I told her we could try reading it together, and she is open to that, but right now she decided she would rather wait. I am okay with that. I would rather wait until she is patient enough to absorb it properly instead of her just reading it and not understanding any of it.

On a side note - (not sure if I mentioned this already in any posts) we were in HalfPrice books about a week or so ago, and we were looking for a few new books for her and her sisters to read. There was an older couple near us, and the wife piped up and said that we should try Piers Anthony's Xanth series. I didn't realize he wrote books for teens - my husband has read a lot of his books, but I didn't think it would be age appropriate. She stated that the books have a lot of neat plays on words, puns, etc., and kids usually get a kick out of it. I found the first one in the series, and plan on reading it with her in the coming weeks.

[RightJungle]

I don't have any children at home but I bought "An Island Called Liberty" ...well, just because. My adult friends smile and agree with it whole heartedly. Here is its description from Amazon:

Product Description

"This book is a cross between Dr. Seuss and Ayn Rand's Atlas Shrugged," writes the publisher. Younger children will enjoy the rhyming verse and beautiful, full-color illustrations on every page, while older children and adults will enjoy the strong message that speaks in favor of free markets and against excessive government regulation, bureaucracy, and taxation.

About the Author

Joseph Specht has almost twenty years of experience in business and banking, and knows the impact that excessive regulation and taxation have on the average family and the average small business. While he doesn't expect this book to alter the course of human events, he hopes that it will cause readers to think of free markets and government regulation in new ways.

It's a little expensive at $14.95 but is eligible for free shipping if you come up with a few others.

[Selene]

I don't have any children at home but I bought "An Island Called Liberty" ...well, just because. My adult friends smile and agree with it whole heartedly. Here is its description from Amazon:

Product Description

"This book is a cross between Dr. Seuss and Ayn Rand's Atlas Shrugged," writes the publisher. Younger children will enjoy the rhyming verse and beautiful, full-color illustrations on every page, while older children and adults will enjoy the strong message that speaks in favor of free markets and against excessive government regulation, bureaucracy, and taxation.

About the Author

Joseph Specht has almost twenty years of experience in business and banking, and knows the impact that excessive regulation and taxation have on the average family and the average small business. While he doesn't expect this book to alter the course of human events, he hopes that it will cause readers to think of free markets and government regulation in new ways.

It's a little expensive at $14.95 but is eligible for free shipping if you come up with a few others.

Lol ...my Missouri Randian nest has some home schoolers and I recommended it to them, even though I have not read it myself as my two children are either in college or graduated.

So is it as good as it looked?

Adam

[Chris Grieb]

I don't have any children at home but I bought "An Island Called Liberty" ...well, just because. My adult friends smile and agree with it whole heartedly. Here is its description from Amazon:

Product Description

"This book is a cross between Dr. Seuss and Ayn Rand's Atlas Shrugged," writes the publisher. Younger children will enjoy the rhyming verse and beautiful, full-color illustrations on every page, while older children and adults will enjoy the strong message that speaks in favor of free markets and against excessive government regulation, bureaucracy, and taxation.

About the Author

Joseph Specht has almost twenty years of experience in business and banking, and knows the impact that excessive regulation and taxation have on the average family and the average small business. While he doesn't expect this book to alter the course of human events, he hopes that it will cause readers to think of free markets and government regulation in new ways.

It's a little expensive at $14.95 but is eligible for free shipping if you come up with a few others.

to them, even though I have not read it myself as my two children are either in college or graduated.

Lol ...my Missouri Randian nest has some home schoolers and I recommended it

So is it as good as it looked?

Adam

At Freedom Fest I noticed "The Girl Who Owned a City" is available from LFB. That is a good book for junior high school age.

[anonrobt]

I don't have any children at home but I bought "An Island Called Liberty" ...well, just because. My adult friends smile and agree with it whole heartedly. Here is its description from Amazon:

Product Description

"This book is a cross between Dr. Seuss and Ayn Rand's Atlas Shrugged," writes the publisher. Younger children will enjoy the rhyming verse and beautiful, full-color illustrations on every page, while older children and adults will enjoy the strong message that speaks in favor of free markets and against excessive government regulation, bureaucracy, and taxation.

About the Author

Joseph Specht has almost twenty years of experience in business and banking, and knows the impact that excessive regulation and taxation have on the average family and the average small business. While he doesn't expect this book to alter the course of human events, he hopes that it will cause readers to think of free markets and government regulation in new ways.

It's a little expensive at $14.95 but is eligible for free shipping if you come up with a few others.

to them, even though I have not read it myself as my two children are either in college or graduated.

Lol ...my Missouri Randian nest has some home schoolers and I recommended it

So is it as good as it looked?

Adam

At Freedom Fest I noticed "The Girl Who Owned a City" is available from LFB. That is a good book for junior high school age.

Just make sure what version of the book it is - it has been altered from its original in many versions, as discovered when going thru it in the bookstores a few years ago...

[Chris Grieb]

I don't have any children at home but I bought "An Island Called Liberty" ...well, just because. My adult friends smile and agree with it whole heartedly. Here is its description from Amazon:

Product Description

"This book is a cross between Dr. Seuss and Ayn Rand's Atlas Shrugged," writes the publisher. Younger children will enjoy the rhyming verse and beautiful, full-color illustrations on every page, while older children and adults will enjoy the strong message that speaks in favor of free markets and against excessive government regulation, bureaucracy, and taxation.

About the Author

Joseph Specht has almost twenty years of experience in business and banking, and knows the impact that excessive regulation and taxation have on the average family and the average small business. While he doesn't expect this book to alter the course of human events, he hopes that it will cause readers to think of free markets and government regulation in new ways.

It's a little expensive at $14.95 but is eligible for free shipping if you come up with a few others.

to them, even though I have not read it myself as my two children are either in college or graduated.

Lol ...my Missouri Randian nest has some home schoolers and I recommended it

So is it as good as it looked?

Adam

At Freedom Fest I noticed "The Girl Who Owned a City" is available from LFB. That is a good book for junior high school age.

Just make sure what version of the book it is - it has been altered from its original in many versions, as discovered when going thru it in the bookstores a few years ago...

Thanks for the heads up.

[CNA]

It's been a long time since I posted here so always feel like a total newbie. I'm ecstatic to hear that a few are home schooling their kids and it is a definite challenge especially special needs children but also many benefits to it. And ooh, so don't get me started on our public school system for special needs kids. My, my, I can post some stuff that would knock most people out of their socks and what these teachers get away with and it's even more downright horrifying that a lot of these so called teachers are still teaching. They are pure evil from the bowels of hell if there was one. I am the last person to speak with about our school system as I'm not sure I would be able to control my anger. At any rate, my son is also home schooled but for very good reason and it is a challenge. But he has more disabilities than what we had initially thought so homeschooling for me will be more difficult because of the services he is going to need to catch up. But I do anticipate in the future that he will be pulled out and exclusively home schooled or put into an independent study program where he attends one day a week where he takes his tests. Leaves the school with his assignments for the week, reading, etc., to return the next week for one day and do the testing and this is repeated until they graduate. So much more convenient and not having to put up with all the BS that is our school system not only with staff but students as well. Many many options as these kids get older.

To make this short, after his two month stay in the hospital because of what happened to him at school, I was provided a lot of books, videos to watch, etc., parent training in how to help him get through what happened to him as well as how to teach him. One is Rick Lavoie, although not entirely objectivist but it gives a whole new perspective into understanding children with disabilities, will make you think, will make you cry, but it is powerful and will hit home, especially for me after what happened with my son and literally in tears and had to leave the hospital just for a while. But it no doubt was some of the best videos I have seen up to this point in understanding disabled kids, how to teach them, how to get through to them, etc., behavior strategies.

http://www.ricklavoie.com/videos.html

http://www.homeschooltopsites.com/

Also you may want to check your local library as there seems to be many parents that gather there for homeschooling, group activities, social skills, etc. At least in my area there is. I pulled my son out back in Feb and he's still being homeschooled but will more than likely be heading back soon but into a private specialized school for his unique situation with the services to help him recover and catch up.

As I get more time in the future, hopefully soon, I will post some other things I was given while my son was in the hospital that would be beneficial.

I hope for the best for you and congratulations on taking on such an immense responsibility of homeschooling a special needs child!!

Angie

[Philip Coates]

Hi Angie, good to see you back here.

How old is your son and what is his special situation with regard to learning needs? I may or may not have taught his age group (and have taught mostly gifted or advanced and older kids) but if I have any bright ideas I can post them.

[CNA]

Hi Angie, good to see you back here.

How old is your son and what is his special situation with regard to learning needs? I may or may not have taught his age group (and have taught mostly gifted or advanced and older kids) but if I have any bright ideas I can post them.

Hi Phillip,

There's a lot to it but Chris is now 9. We knew he was a high functioning autistic and he was intelligent but was unaware of his other disabilities until something traumatic happened at school which ultimately prompted me to pull him out of school and having him assessed by some of the best doctors in their fields, some world renowned as we are building a very very strong case for future multiple civil suits and potential criminal prosecution against 4 school staff members. It's a lot and a complex case. He's very smart but of course has splintered skills which is common for autistic children. He's had so many tests performed on him. His strongest area of course is science wherein he has consistently scored 128 to 132 IQ but other areas have significant weaknesses. I know it's hard to judge overall intelligence and IQ but given he has had 4 or 5 separate IQ tests, he consistently scores in that range for science. But I will list all the disabilities we currently know of. He is scheduled for another appointment with a neuropsychologist on Monday for academic testing and achievement testing in addition to memory assessments and so forth in which I am sure we will learn as to whether there are any specific learning disabilities. The behaviors he began to demonstrate recently were new and something he had never done before and became extreme. This was as a result of their making the decision to place him into general ed with little support under the diagnosis of Speech and Language Impairment and resulted in severe regression and extreme maladaptive behavior changes, despite their knowing he was autistic and noted in their school files of other suspected disabilities but did nothing which is in violation of IDEA laws governing the schools to locate and identify kids in and outside of school, nor did they inform me or his father that they suspected other disabilities.

His current diagnoses as of right now are and I'll give what it states in the evals up to this point:

First Psyche Eval by Dr. Peegen Cronin, Phd, professor at UCLA

Diagnosis: Comprehensive psychiatric diagnoses are listed in a multi axial format with Axis 1 representing the current diagnoses that are consistent with the cognitive, affective, and behavioral presentation. The second axis lists any personality disorders or mental retardation. Axis III lists any medical conditions, and Axis IV lists current environmental stressors. Axis V is a numerical assessment of functioning based on a scale of 0 to 100 listed in the diagnostic manual (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual IV, 1994.

Axis 1 Autistic Disorder

Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), Combined Type (By History)

Mood disorder not otherwise specified

Axis II No Diagnosis on Axis II

Axis III No current medical problems

Axis IV Stressors: Adaptive functioning deficits commensurate with this diagnosis and access to sufficient community and educational services; family stress associated with severe behavioral and adaptive difficulties

Axis V Current Global Assessment of Functioning (GAF) 35

Speech and Language Eval by Dr. Lee at UCLA

Speech Apraxia

Mixed Receptive-Expressive Language Disorder

Phonological Articulation Delay

Auditory Language Memory Deficits

Impaired Pragmatic Language Skills related to Autism-spectrum disorder

2nd psych eval while hospitalized for 2 months at UCLA

The results of the completed tests, in addition to the clinical observations, corroborate the conclusions of prior evaluations that indicate Chris meets criteria for the diagnosis of Autism, mood disorder not otherwise specified.

(Chris doesn't have a mood disorder but rather it is situational and the environment that he is in that will bring out the behavioral issues that were seen at his school, basically he did not have the supports he was needing and the school ignored it and did nothing to help him but rather allowed him to disintegrate and regress substantially, to be the subject of extensive bullying where he was assaulted on school grounds as well as abuse at the hands of his teachers. UCLA kicked ass and brought Chris back and on the road to recovery after what happened to him at school. I owe them so much and what they did for Chris. It was pretty bad. But when he was discharged, my baby boy was 85 percent of what he was before all this shit happened to him at school so I am forever grateful.

Audiometric Evaluation for Central Auditory Processing Disorder found Chris to be severely to profoundly disabled

Vision Therapy Evaluation Report found Chris to have substantial deficits in Magnocellular Visual Skills severely inadequate, Visual Efficiency Skill severely inadequate, Working Memory Skills severely inadequate, Motor Planning and Sequencing severely inadequate. (This is why Christopher has hard time with occupational aspects such as his handwriting can be messy, holding pencils (no longer an issue though because of OT, is because his hand eye coordination is bad. It's not fine motor issues as we thought. It's because his eyesight is poor. This also accounts for his distractibility, etc. His visual processing is delayed, has a hard time focussing, hard time reading because the letters and sentences move when he reads, etc., slower reading, dyslexia. So he has a vision disability which vision therapies will remediate this, improve his writing, reading skills, math, etc., etc.

We've had him tested for Fragile X which came back negative thankfully. He was checked for seizures which came back negative. He had EKG which came back fine. He's had other medical tests performed to rule out possibilities for some of these issues and behavior problems. He has a neuropsych appointment coming up which will elucidate his strengths and weaknesses academically and any possible learning disabilities. The boy is just so damn smart but put into an abusive environment at school where he could not cope and began to seriously regress, behaviors that we had never seen before were becoming apparently. If the school had told us of these other disabilities that they were suspecting, I would have taken him sooner and what happened to him at school wouldn't have happened to him.

I know you're a psychologist and interested in these types of things. I'm going to post something that is disturbing and traumatic to read but I think it warrants attention because this is happening in our schools every day, every year, thousands upon thousands of cases reported every year. And to any parents out there, NEVER ASSUME ANYTHING. If your child comes home and tells you they got in trouble and were given a time out or what have you, ALWAYS ask specific questions such as, what happened, why were you put in time out, where were you put, were you put into a room, how long were you there, who was there, what were they saying, did they hurt you, etc., etc., etc. NEVER ASSUME that if they say, mom, I got in trouble. And then you ask what did you get in trouble over and then they tell you. then the parent may say, well, don't do it again, okay. And that's it of the investigation on the parents part. NEVER DO THIS. Ask detailed questions ALWAYS and NEVER ASSUME. If you suspect something, go to the school immediately and ask questions and mainly "Do you have a seclusion room?" If they say yes, tell them you would like to inspect it. You'd be quite surprised how many public schools have such facilities as a seclusion room on school grounds.

Read at your own risk. Not all the kids described in this GAO investigation file are special needs kids, it also happens to our general ed kids as well and a lot of these teachers are still teaching our kids.

http://www.gao.gov/new.items/d09719t.pdf

http://74.125.155.132/search?q=cache:sPXKTBi7pesJ:www.disabilityrightsca.org/Pubs/701801.pdf+Lethal+effects+of+prone+restraint&cd=1&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us

At any rate, Philip, thank you so much for wanting to add your insight and expertise into this. Chris is extremely intelligent but has splintered skills. Dr. Cronin made a comment that although he is high functioning autistic and does possess splintered skills which is very common in autistic kids, he very much possesses many savant traits. After what happened to him at school, it's going to take a lot to bring him back and he's doing exceptionally well now, especially since I pulled him out. Not quite my old Chris yet but getting there. I am sure once his therapies go into effect, I do expect a substantial improvement fairly quickly. This is just his personality. Once he gets into the appropriate environment, the boy takes off like a bat out of hell and exceeds everyone's expectations.

Angie

[CNA]

Hi Angie, good to see you back here.

How old is your son and what is his special situation with regard to learning needs? I may or may not have taught his age group (and have taught mostly gifted or advanced and older kids) but if I have any bright ideas I can post them.

Oh, and Philip, since I went over his disabling conditions up to this point, in regards to his learning needs, we have an understanding of what they are or will be up to this point but we are still in the process of having assessments done. Once we get the rest of them in, it'll be easier to determine an IEP based on his unique needs and his education. But if you have any ideas based on what I've posted in regards to his disabilities, OMG, they are more than welcome and thank you. While he was in the hospital, we had extensive parent training based on his disabilities that included a behavior intervention plan to stop the maladpative behaviors. But I am ecstatic to report that once Chris was pulled out of school, a lot of the new symptoms such as the maladaptive behaviors we had never seen before disappeared. But nonetheless, the behavior plan given to us addressed a lot which we still are using today.

[Philip Coates]

Angie,

You said "I know you're a psychologist". I'm not and have no special knowledge regarding disabilities. I've been a teacher. As a hyperactive, bright but often bored, somewhat rebellious kid who didn't fit into the public schools until junior high, the only thing I can do is share some of what worked for me, helped pull me out and up. Maybe some of it can be extracted and adapted for your son.

I won't use psychological jargon - (I know that's what the professionals have described your son in terms of). First, because I don't know it. Also because things need to be understood in every day language. [[For example: I wouldn't describe someone as having a "mood disorder". What does that mean exactly? I would want to hear actions and behavior described concretely: "He has tantrums, throws things and bites." Things were not described in terms of syndromes and DSM and medical conditions when I grew up. Instead, very specific events and issues [this is made up but plausible]: "He can't sit still. He's bored and trying to show off. He doesn't get along with some of the other children and they push him or steal his lunch." ]]

I was an only child and we moved a lot (Army brat). So it wasn't until we settled down permanently that I started having permanent friends. That helped my adjustment and my state of mind a lot. In primary school, I loved to go outdoors and run around and explore and experiment with things - throwing, chasing, jumping, etc. Around age nine or ten, I discovered books. A lot of science fiction. We also had children's editions of classics for that age - fairy tales, myths, stories by Dumas and Stevenson and Kipling and so on. The Tintin comic books and Classics Illustrated. Also some selected 'trash' like Mad Magazine. :-)

I mention this because the activity, the playmates, the books whether picture books or not are outlets. If your son is unhappy or threatened in school, finding something, anything that distracts him or gives him a feeling of efficacy or a sane universe is perhaps worth all the pills and doctors in the world.

Let me stop for now. But one last thing. You mentioned science, which reminds me of related things. Technology? Gadgets? If he becomes a reader when he gets to middle school age, the very best science short and interesting essay and exploration and explanation writer is Isaac Asimov. If you go to B&N you won't find his books in the science section, since he wrote them decades ago. They were anthologized. You have to order his anthologies online. "View From a Height" is one of the best collections. Just having books hanging around without pressuring him to at any time read one is a good idea. If you are homeschooling or trying to help, reading a couple of these - they work for older chilren as well as for adults, as I can testify - might give you context or ideas as you observe or interact with his science interests.

At an earlier age, the hands on 'educational' and manipulative toys as long as not too complicated or difficult for young hands (Erector sets were introduced to me too early) are nice...if he can find one he likes. You have to start easy and I don't know what is in that sweet spot between too hard and not challenging enough. Tinker toys? Meccano? Lego? Train sets. Little rubegoldbergish gadgets that have balls slide down ramps and drop. Telescopes and microscopes and science kits.

The difficulty is finding things that he -does- like rather than what you think he ought to like. And that's probably a lot of trial and error and outgrowing and discarding.

There are books of home experiments - things you can do with water and bottles and string and household stuff - in the young people's section or educational catalogs.

I never got into art, drawing, singing, or playing a musical instrument. But when I was older than your son, I was in two school plays. For the first time, something social yet involving skill and precision. And being allowed to be a ham.

The net result of all this stuff is ...slowly, very slowly.... I came out of my shell, became a good student, evolved from being a pariah to being popular and happy and well-adjusted. Which no one would have expected three or four years earlier.

Edited October 17, 2009 by Philip Coates

[CNA]

Angie,

You said "I know you're a psychologist". I'm not and have no special knowledge regarding disabilities. I've been a teacher. As a hyperactive, bright but often bored, somewhat rebellious kid who didn't fit into the public schools until junior high, the only thing I can do is share some of what worked for me, helped pull me out and up. Maybe some of it can be extracted and adapted for your son.

Oh, I thought you were a psychologist. I know there's a few on OL that are. I apologize. It's been a long time since I've really gone through OL. I do read on occasion though. I also hope I can get the quote thing down as well but I'll soon see how it turns out when posting. LOL

I won't use psychological jargon - (I know that's what the professionals have described your son in terms of). First, because I don't know it. Also because things need to be understood in every day language. [[For example: I wouldn't describe someone as having a "mood disorder". What does that mean exactly?

As they would specify it and trying to figure out if it was anxiety, depression, etc. The reason the characterized it as mood disorder not otherwise specified is because he doesn't have a mood disorder per se. But of course, if he gets into a situation such that he did at school and the stressors, he has anxiety, starts to exhibit signs of depression and so forth. But once removed from that situation, many of the symptoms he was exhibiting such as the extreme anxiety, agitation, etc., disappeared. It's unfortunate as we all know that being a young child and unable to enforce your own identity, control of your situation and being forced to endure pain, frustration, etc., it takes its toll very negatively on such a young child. Although he can make decisions, it's difficult to take control of his life when he has to go back to the same enviro day in and day out. We were having problems with bullying incidences in Dec when all of this started. I kept talking with the teachers, principal, and was constantly assured that they were taking care of the problems. Well, obviously they weren't because Chris would come home complaining of being bullied. I would once again confront the school and told the same BS line. Well, it continued to escalate in turn putting more and more stress, fear, anxiety onto Chris because it wasn't being taken care of by the school staff.

I would want to hear actions and behavior described concretely: "He has tantrums, throws things and bites." Things were not described in terms of syndromes and DSM and medical conditions when I grew up. Instead, very specific events and issues [this is made up but plausible]: "He can't sit still. He's bored and trying to show off. He doesn't get along with some of the other children and they push him or steal his lunch." ]]

He was having meltdowns but not any longer. Uncontrollable crying while at school. Didn't throw things or bite or assaultive to anyone. Chris is passive, shy, timid. His meltdowns, etc., was his way of telling someone that he needed help; that something was seriously wrong. Nothing was being done by school personnel in regards to what was happening to him. He would tell me and I would tell them and they would tell me that they were being addressed. When they weren't being addressed, Chris was driven to other means to express himself that something was seriously wrong.

It's very interesting in what I've learned from the doctors I have taken him to, especially the ones that are world renowned, and the reasons he has been exhibiting some of these symptoms. They gave a combined diagnosis of autism and ADHD. Well, in some of his assessments we have found that some of his vision issues explains the distractibility, his fidgetiness, etc., is as a result of one of his vision disabilities. He's constantly in fight or flight mode because of the specific vision issues; with the tracking, teaming, and slow focussing, he's unsure as to what is fully going on around him because he cannot recognize or process the information fast enough so it sends him into flight mode, you know, run or stay and fight. Since he is not confrontational and is passive, his first reaction is to flee and he is always on alert if you will such as for example prey is when they know there are predators around, always in fight or flight mode. Once the brain finally processes and finally catches up and he realizes that it is not a threat, he calms down. But these vision issues have gone uncorrected for many years and that higher stress load is having negative consequences on his body and his psyche. He's learning to tune everything out or as they sometimes say in regards to these kids, "He seems to be in his own little world; he's hard to reach sometimes."

With autistic kids, most if not all of them lack social skills. This is Chris' worst aspect of his disability. His social skills are horrendous and this is what has been causing a lot of peer tension for him. You have to teach the kids step by step this is what you should do, this is how you should say it in this tone, etc. It's not only in the school environment but across all environments. Chris has a hard time recognizing intonation when you are just being serious or if you are angry, he may interpret your body language incorrectly. The other night talking on the phone with my child advocate and she told me very good news, I became very excited and my voice rose. Chris did not recognize this as excitement. All he heard was my voice raise. There wasn't much body gesture from me such as high five type stuff because I was on the phone. After I got off the phone, he said, mom, who were you fighting with. I was like, honey, we weren't fighting. I'm happy because of something that Kristine told me about.

After thinking about this, it may be really difficult to describe areas of problems such as not sitting still, etc., because there's so many different aspects going on. The not sitting still deal has roots in his vision processing issues and always being in fight or flight mode, his lack of social awareness and what is appropriate and what's not appropriate. When he is placed back into school, they will have to work around this and adjust his educational program while he recieves therapies to correct the visual processing issues, social skill training groups, speech therapies, etc., etc., as his speech is also affecting his relationships with his peers socially and another reason why he is being bullied. Basically they will have to put in accomodations educationally for him until these other areas are brought up to where they should be.

I was an only child and we moved a lot (Army brat). So it wasn't until we settled down permanently that I started having permanent friends. That helped my adjustment and my state of mind a lot. In primary school, I loved to go outdoors and run around and explore and experiment with things - throwing, chasing, jumping, etc. Around age nine or ten, I discovered books. A lot of science fiction. We also had children's editions of classics for that age - fairy tales, myths, stories by Dumas and Stevenson and Kipling and so on. The Tintin comic books and Classics Illustrated. Also some selected 'trash' like Mad Magazine. :-)

Chris is also an only child. He loves science books. He loves computers. He loves playing with other kids but only select kids he will play with and these kids are aware of his disabilities and areas he struggles with and he is not reprimanded or bullied for things he doesn't understand is not appropriate. I am very selective on what books I want him to read; such as, the classics of disneyland and what these stories ultimately teach the kids which is self-sacrifice and so forth. Chris enjoys fiction books but Chris is always drawn to sciences, medicine, astronomy, etc. He's very much grounded in facts. There is no grey areas. He is very literal, black and white. He does ocassionally read comic books. He loves a site called Club Penguin which I am very much involved with. It's a social networking site for kids ages 6 to 16. It is heavily filtered, moderators everywhere, secret agents they call them everywhere on the Island enforcing safety, privacy, etc. I'm also heavily involved in it. They teach the value of money and hard work to gain money or coins and to earn achievements. It teaches social skills. Teaches kids how to type, read, math, and so forth. There are drawbacks to the site but the rewards and what he is learning socially, some of the values he is learning from the site far outweigh the drawbacks.

I mention this because the activity, the playmates, the books whether picture books or not are outlets. If your son is unhappy or threatened in school, finding something, anything that distracts him or gives him a feeling of efficacy or a sane universe is perhaps worth all the pills and doctors in the world.

Yeah, he most definitely does this. He also very much enjoys golf and is getting pretty good at it. He loves music. He definitely has many outlets. We overall do not have a problem with Chris when he is at home. It's just when he was at school it was having a severe detrimental impact to him. As soon as we pulled him out, a lot of issues disappeared but the fear, the sadness, anger of what happened to him still persisted. But the longer we have kept him out and homeschooling him a lot of those issues are slowly disappearing. He does the typical kid stuff of sometimes disobeying, etc., but he's asserting his identity and his right to control his own life which I understand. He does have set responsibilities in the house such as cleaning up after himself, etc., etc., and these he cannot get away with not doing. He has to learn to start taking care of himself rather than depending on others to do it for him. So I do not interfere too much with "forcing" him to do things or not giving him a choice, you know, how some parents can be total control freaks which ultimately pushes the child away and they in turn become even more disobedient, rebellious, etc., because they can't assert their own unique individuality with the ability to make choices that determines their life. As for medications, I was hesitant to because I don't want my child to be medicated so he is more compliant with adults demands, etc. Rather than being drugged up, Chris needs to learn the skills necessary for him to survive and to be able to take control of his life, to make decisions that will help him. I am to an extent against medication depending on each person's unique situation and disabilities. I know a child that has a traumatic brain injury and medications are definitely needed. With Chris, there is hope, although with all of his challenges, these are challenges that can be remediated and minimized through therapies and teaching him coping skills, social skills, bringing his speech up to where he can adequately express himself, to have meaningful conversations.

All the doctors that he was brought to I heavily researched to ensure they would do what I was ultimately looking for for Chris; that is, give recommendations as to what Chris will need in the way of therapies in order for him to thrive and become a successful learner. As of right now and the doctor's recommendations, Chris is lined up to recieve 2.5 hours a week of individual speech therapy, 1 hour a week of speech therapy in group environment for conversational social skills, 1.5 hours a week of social skills training group, 1 hour a week of recreational therapy in a structured peer group activity, 3 days a week for the next two years of vision therapy to correct the vision issues and 6 days a week for 20 minutes of in home therapy to be given by the parents as well as "fun" computer vision therapies that he can play when he is on the computer, for his CAPD, he will recieve 3 days a week of audiometric therapies to improve but not completely correct unfortunately the central auditory processing issues.

Although the doctors did say that he may very well likely benefit from some type of medication to help slow him down a bit in conjunction with this therapies in that he will be able to access the therapies more efficiently to help him learn the skills he needs but the medication would not be permenant. It would be to get him to the point of recovering enough and once again functioning at where he was before all this happened to him at school. Chris was doing wonderfully in school, progressing, etc., that is until they put him into general ed where not only was he assaulted by students but also by 4 teachers. Because of this trauma, he regressed. But removing him from school and going to the doctors and the hospitalization wherein they hit him hard with intensive therapies, not medications, but therapies, he is getting back to his old self.

Let me stop for now. But one last thing. You mentioned science, which reminds me of related things. Technology? Gadgets? If he becomes a reader when he gets to middle school age, the very best science short and interesting essay and exploration and explanation writer is Isaac Asimov. If you go to B&N you won't find his books in the science section, since he wrote them decades ago. They were anthologized. You have to order his anthologies online. "View From a Height" is one of the best collections. Just having books hanging around without pressuring him to at any time read one is a good idea. If you are homeschooling or trying to help, reading a couple of these - they work for older chilren as well as for adults, as I can testify - might give you context or ideas as you observe or interact with his science interests.

Hehehehe, I know Isaac fairly well and have also read his work. Very interesting man. Chris hasn't yet read any of these. But our house is filled with a lot of science books ranging from astronomy, anatomy, medicine, life science, dinosaurs, technological advancements and achievements of man, inventions and so forth. He does frequently pick them up to read but only at short bursts because of his eyes. He also loves legos, etc. But unfortunately because very frustrated with the fine motor movements. He had OT therapies and did okay. But since his vision issues are playing a factor into his hand eye coordination, he struggles with it. Once his eye issues are corrected, it should also correct the fine motor issues, hand eye coordination.

The difficulty is finding things that he -does- like rather than what you think he ought to like. And that's probably a lot of trial and error and outgrowing and discarding.

Yes, this has been the most challenging. We have exposed him to things that we thought he might like but ultimately if he says he doesn't like it or what have you, we don't harp on him about it. We introduce something else in hopes he may like that better. But I am now curious since we've found out all of these different issues going on with him such as his vision issues what he once hated he may very well truly enjoy doing. We tried the chemistry sets, how to build a volcano with foam exploding out, mixing safe chemicals to give that effect, etc. He has an interest in it but for a reason we are not entirely clear on is he does not like it. I am not sure if it is because he just doesn't like it or if it's because one of his disabilities is what is preventing him from enjoying it. But we will hopefully soon see once these issues he's having are addressed.

I never got into art, drawing, singing, or playing a musical instrument. But when I was older than your son, I was in two school plays. For the first time, something social yet involving skill and precision. And being allowed to be a ham.

Chris isn't into painting, crafts, etc. As we found out, the vision issues and distortions are more than likely the cause of why he downright detests doing any kind of crafting, painting, etc., etc. or he just straight out doesn't enjoy it and not related to any of the disabilities. We've tried the crafting and painting. Again we'll see once he gets into his therapies. But literally I am sure that we will be discovering a whole new kid once he gets back on track. It'll be interesting to see what areas he once detested he will now enjoy and it was because of any number of the disabilities. It has to be absolutely horrifying and something I will never be able to understand or experience and have to admit tears me up inside, not with guilt, but with great sadness to see someone trapped and struggling to get out but because there's a brain issue going on is struggling to become free and may never be totally free. He loves playing the drums and is quite good at it. We have him in lessons and he is doing some very complex intricate combinations. He can already separate the four limbs independently of each other to do different things. But since he struggles with intonation, he sometimes becomes off beat, etc. BUT this aspect has improved quite a bit and the intonation recognition is becoming more fine tuned and he is getting better....it's just a slow progress.

Thank you so much, Philip, for all the advice and we've tried a lot. Aside from what happened to him and the pain and sadness that goes along with it, I am very very very grateful. I am not one to procrastinate or talk about it. I am action. Get on it and get on it now type deal. What happened put me into serious overdrive with immense determination, decisions and action and bringing Chris to numerous doctors some well respected and world renowned. We've learned so much about my son and we will continue to learn even more about him, why he is, what has happened, and so forth. Knowledge is always power and enables you to make better decisions based on that knowledge and to benefit you in the long run. I have become one hell of an advocate for Chris and I have this school on the run and in serious fear because they know they screwed up. They are attempting to intimidate, strike fear, retaliatory acts against me to prevent us from divulging very damaging evidence against them but it has not worked. I'm not easily intimidated at all. We have them for obstruction of justice, retaliation, discrimination. We already have the LA Times and OC Register, 2 reports aware of the situation with the school and they are waiting for our first suit to be filed which we'll be filing this coming week and their writing a story up on it. My attorney, advocate, myself I guess if you would call it a force to be reckoned with. No doubt the abuse that happened with him at school, etc., all aspects of the civil arena will be explored and heavily pursued. I know the IDEA laws. I know the school's responsibilities in educating special needs kids. I am familiar with Section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act. I know what they are allowed to do and what they are not allowed to do. Even better that I am a court reporter, that I am already familiar with civil rights and when violations occur, what I am allowed to do and what I am not allowed to do. I guess you can say they screwed with the wrong mom. As my mom said, it's the mother grizzly bear that comes out. She is there to protect but not aggressive but if you get too close or do something wrong that is to hurt the cubs, all hell breaks loss and no doubt that is what has happened here.

Thank you so much for the input and it is very well recieved. I will be looking into more of the Isaac books and the ones you brought up. Oh, and also, some of these disabilities may very well have never been picked up but because when UCLA saw Chris and Dr. Cronin realized how unique he truly was in the autism spectrum they quickly put him into a research program and the next thing I knew there was doctors climbing out of the wood works looking at him, evaluating him, testing him, etc. These other areas he was having problems with we were always told that it was his autism. Well, he was never properly assessed. Come to find out, some of these issues are not autism related but totally separate disabilities.

Angie

[Selene]

Angie:

Congratulations. That was a real rough road.

Your decision to "home school" decisively changed your child's life. I taught a bible studies class at our home and it got a pretty good reputation in the

community we lived in.

The next year I got a phone call from a mom who asked if I would take her "autistic" child because she heard I had a different approach. I stopped her

as she started to tell me all the problems he had in the other classes.

I said to her that I do not know that he has autism, he's been diagnosed, so what? I asked her what he liked and whether she could drop him off an hour early.

She told me Pokeman cards and I said great, my daughter was the Pokeman Queen of the neighborhood.

At any rate her son and I went for a walk. He told me, while we were looking for birds on the walk, that he needed to get up and sometimes did not remember to ask

and a slew of other "behaviors".

I told him that it was no problem and since we had four cats, the cats needed a good chasing around the house so he could get up and chase the cats or go in the next room and use his game boy and then come back in.

When he realized that he could chase the cats and not get yelled at he was ecstatic. He never did catch one, lol, but he got that energy tension out by his own volition.

He never missed a class, he was one of my better students and everyone else, including my daughter, worked perfectly with it.

I have some ideas that you might want to explore.

Great job.

Adam

Edited October 17, 2009 by Selene

[CNA]

Angie:

Congratulations. That was a real rough road.

Your decision to "home school" decisively changed your child's life. I taught a bible studies class at our home and it got a pretty good reputation in the

community we lived in.

The next year I got a phone call from a mom who asked if I would take her "autistic" child because she heard I had a different approach. I stopped her

as she started to tell me all the problems he had in the other classes.

I said to her that I do not know that he has autism, he's been diagnosed, so what? I asked her what he liked and whether she could drop him off an hour early.

She told me Pokeman cards and I said great, my daughter was the Pokeman Queen of the neighborhood.

At any rate her son and I went for a walk. He told me, while we were looking for birds on the walk, that he needed to get up and sometimes did not remember to ask

and a slew of other "behaviors".

I told him that it was no problem and since we had four cats, the cats needed a good chasing around the house so he could get up and chase the cats or go in the next room and use his game boy and then come back in.

When he realized that he could chase the cats and not get yelled at he was ecstatic. He never did catch one, lol, but he got that energy tension out by his own volition.

He never missed a class, he was one of my better students and everyone else, including my daughter, worked perfectly with it.

I have some ideas that you might want to explore.

Great job.

Adam

Hi Adam,

That is wonderful. It most definitely helps these autistic kids that they are not reprimanded, etc., and so forth for things they don't understand is inappropriate or what have you. They have to be taught. They don't just pick up on it like other kids do. Unfortunately when they are reprimanded over and over and aren't shown what is inappropriate, etc., etc., and why they got in trouble and shown how to go about it differently, it slowly destroys their self-esteem as it did in my son. It got to the point that he thought everything he did was wrong and he was bad because of it because he was being reprimanded all the time in school. It just tears me up to see that my child was suffering so much by the hands of the people that were abusing him, that had no clue how to handle a special needs kids when they are supposed to be trained, etc., to educate these kids. But yes, most definitely pulling him out saved my son on so many levels and still brings tears to my eyes. It will no doubt be a recovery process for myself as well. But I know I'm fighting back very very hard and he is coming back. He's almost recovered from the ordeal, not entirely, but my baby boy is coming back!!!!!!!! I'll write a bit more but I have to go pick up my niece and bring her back to my place. She wants to see Chris.

Please do provide suggestions, they are most appreciated and thank you!!!

Angie

[CNA]

I know I was supposed to come back and write a bit more and talk with Adam a bit about further suggestions that he may have wanted to offer. Well, if it's not one thing, it's something else with the school and my ongoing battle with them that has turned extremely nasty. Quite amazing enough. Things have been hectic these past few days, especially today with them. We requested of the judge for an open hearing to the general public because I have a few reporters from LA and OC papers interested in attending the hearings and writing on it and following the progression of our ordeal with the school district. Well, they (school) didn't like this too much when they found out that the parents have a right under IDEA laws to have an open hearing to the general public and the school now knowing that their public image is now going to be so heavily tarnished and reporters everywhere inquiring as to what is happening, in addition to our getting the state dept of ed involved and now doing their own investigation into the school district and 4 school staff members in particular. Basically the district is running scared and tried to pull some BS delay tactic and once again harassment, intimidation, and retaliation against us as the parents today which really upset the OAH personnel. So I'll be around sooner or later. Hopefully once things calm down a bit more and I get some additional time, it'll be easier for me to sit down and write and talking with anyone that has suggestions or hell, if I can help in any way as it is when it comes to the PAI SERR manual, IDEA laws, and Section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act or even for kids in general ed that are needing some type of help and I may be able to help and give advice to them or anyone having issues with their school and navigating through all the red tape, BS lines and lies, compliance issues, and so forth when it comes to their schooling and the school system.

When I get a bit more time and not having to deal with these idiots and their whining and tantrums that they seem to throw every time we land a bombshell on them, it'll be easier then. Thank you to both Philip and Adam!!!

Angie

Edited October 22, 2009 by CNA

[Philip Coates]

Angie, I can see by your previous posts on what you've been trying to do to get your son an education that you are a very good, concerned parent, fierce and focused as a tiger where important things are concerned.

Just as an aside, as a teacher at more than one private school and in both middle school and high school levels, I became well-known for being able to get along with the 'difficult' parents, the ones the administrators and other teachers sometimes were afraid or or wanted to run and hide from because they kept a skeptical eagle eye on everything the teacher did, every assignment handed out, questioned everything, "is this busy work?", wanted to talk a lot, were often critical.

I actually liked this - and them. Much more than the mail-it-in, 'whatever, dude' type parents. They were fighting for their kid. I exchanged tons of email, explained, had conferences, went to lunch. Every one of them ended up -loving- me. They weren't 'difficult' parents at all with me. Because I gave them every bit of time they needed and enjoyed doing it. Hell, I even learned a lot doing this.

I was a type A teacher - try to do everything perfectly as far as the students' education is concerned, be completely and absolutely prepared for every lesson. And they were type A parents as far as their kids' education was concerned.

Student: "Mr. Coates, how much of this book or this unit should we focus on?"

Mr. Coates: LEARN ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING

Student: "Mr. C, what will be on the test?"

Mr. Coates: See above answer: A.E.

(Ok, I'm having a bit of fun here...some exaggeration)

Edited October 22, 2009 by Philip Coates

[Martin Radwin]

Angie,

Assuming that you are not able to continue home schooling your son indefinitely and must at some point have him return to school, one thing that you might consider is trying to find a really good private school and sending him there.

My daughter is the same age as your son, 9 years old. She attends a small private Montessori school. We really love this school. Not only does it present an academically stimulating environment but it is very balanced as well, focusing on the total social/emotional/psychological development of the kids, as well as their academic development. One of the main focuses of this school is on developing non-violent communication and behavioral skills among the kids. Translated, the name of our school is "House of peace", and this really reflects the underlying school philosophy. At our school, there is no way in ten lifetimes that any teacher or other staff member would ever treat any child the way your son was treated by your school staff. Teachers treat the children with utmost respect. Nor is any kind of bullying by other children tolerated. This is simply not considered to be acceptable behavior by either teachers or children. As such, our school presents a very safe environment for the kids. When we send our daughter off to school, we never have to worry about something bad happening to her. And if your son were attending our school, I can absolutely assure you that none of the bad things that happened to him at your school would have happened to him here.

Of course, not all private schools have a nurturing environment like this. There are some really bad private schools as well. So you really have to look around and check out many different schools to find a really good one that would meet the needs of your son.

I really believe that efforts to reform public schools are futile. They are huge bureaucratic monstrosities controlled by top-down rules set down by stupid bureaucrats. They have absolutely no incentive to even attempt to please either parents or children, since they financed by taxes and maintained by compulsory attendance laws. Public schools are structured for the benefit of government, education bureaucrats, school administrators, and teachers. Parents and children do not even figure into any of this. Trying to change them in any significant way is quite impossible. By contrast, however, it is very much within your power to find a good private school that will work for you and your son. Focus your energy on what you have the power to change, rather than on that which by its very nature is fundamentally unchangeable.

Good luck!

Martin

[Selene]

Excellent post Martin:

I am talking with some folks in various states to put together a class action suit with standing.

Most of the cases where individual parents have sued the State for a failure to educate have failed. Even though that is easy to establish, the courts have continuously upheld the

state right to educate its citizen and that it is not responsible for results.

It is even more difficult at the federal level because there is no federal right to an education.

My standing would relate specifically to the pattern of discrimination which is financial in nature. It will survive a motion to dismiss and then the fun will begin.

Discovery is a wonderful path to walk. lol

Adam

[CNA]

Angie,

Assuming that you are not able to continue home schooling your son indefinitely and must at some point have him return to school, one thing that you might consider is trying to find a really good private school and sending him there.

My daughter is the same age as your son, 9 years old. She attends a small private Montessori school. We really love this school. Not only does it present an academically stimulating environment but it is very balanced as well, focusing on the total social/emotional/psychological development of the kids, as well as their academic development. One of the main focuses of this school is on developing non-violent communication and behavioral skills among the kids. Translated, the name of our school is "House of peace", and this really reflects the underlying school philosophy. At our school, there is no way in ten lifetimes that any teacher or other staff member would ever treat any child the way your son was treated by your school staff. Teachers treat the children with utmost respect. Nor is any kind of bullying by other children tolerated. This is simply not considered to be acceptable behavior by either teachers or children. As such, our school presents a very safe environment for the kids. When we send our daughter off to school, we never have to worry about something bad happening to her. And if your son were attending our school, I can absolutely assure you that none of the bad things that happened to him at your school would have happened to him here.

Of course, not all private schools have a nurturing environment like this. There are some really bad private schools as well. So you really have to look around and check out many different schools to find a really good one that would meet the needs of your son.

I really believe that efforts to reform public schools are futile. They are huge bureaucratic monstrosities controlled by top-down rules set down by stupid bureaucrats. They have absolutely no incentive to even attempt to please either parents or children, since they financed by taxes and maintained by compulsory attendance laws. Public schools are structured for the benefit of government, education bureaucrats, school administrators, and teachers. Parents and children do not even figure into any of this. Trying to change them in any significant way is quite impossible. By contrast, however, it is very much within your power to find a good private school that will work for you and your son. Focus your energy on what you have the power to change, rather than on that which by its very nature is fundamentally unchangeable.

Good luck!

Martin

Hi Martin,

Most definitely have checked into private schools and have 2 in mind that I have done heavy heavy research into and this is what we are working towards. I have just hired another expert and this woman is tough as nails. I'm not easily intimidated but this woman is very intimidated and doesn't put up with anything. I also have 2 special education attorneys and a child advocate. So our aresenal of experts is ever growing. You are most definitely correct in that general education kids and their parents have very little power in controlling their child's education but it still can be done if you know the system. BUT when it comes to special needs kids, it's a whole other story. The schools under the IDEA and the United States Dept of Education have very specific laws in regards to what is called FAPE, free appropriate public education. As a result, the schools and districts are heavily regulated. I'll provide some quick excerpts in what laws govern schools when it comes to providing an appropriate education for a child with disabilities:

The Individuals with Disabilities Education Act includes the Child Find mandate. Child Find requires all school districts TO identify, locate and evaluate all children with disabilities, regardless of the severity of their disabilities. This obligation to identify all children who may need special education services exists even if the school is not providing special education services to the child.

The IDEA requires all States to develop and implement a practical method of determining which children with disabilities are receiving special education and related services and which children are not. (20 U.S.C. 1412(a)(3)

Schools are required to locate, identify and evaluate all children with disabilities from birth through age 21. The Child Find mandate applies to all children who reside within a State, including children who attend private schools and public schools, highly mobile children, migrant children, homeless children, and children who are wards of the state. (20 U.S.C. 1412(a)(3))

This includes all children who are suspected of having a disability, including children who receive passing grades and are "advancing from grade to grade." (34 CFR 300.111©) The law does not require children to be "labeled" or classified by their disability. (20 U.S.C. 1412(a)(3)(B); 34 CFR 300.111(d)).

The primary purpose of the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act is to ensure that all children with disabilities receive a free appropriate public education, including special education and related services that are "designed to meet their unique needs and prepare them for further education, employment and independent living …" (20 U.S.C. 1400(d);

Another purpose of the law is to help each State implement a statewide, comprehensive, coordinated multi-disciplinary system of Early Intervention Services for infants and toddlers with disabilities. Young children with disabilities must receive appropriate early intervention services to "prepare them for further education, employment, and independent living."

Congress encourages states to provide Early Intervention Services so children with developmental delays and other disabilities will receive treatment early. Congress enacted the Early Intervention Program for Infants and Toddlers to provide interagency coordination of services to children from birth to two years of age. Under IDEA, states must ensure that children with disabilities are eligible for special education services by age three.

In addition to this failure of not identifying Chris who now has 9 separate disabilities and some of these disabilities that they suspected then but did nothing is noted in their school records that they suspected other disabilities and did nothing, this was their first HUGE failure and violation of the US Dept of Ed laws and IDEA laws, as well as Section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act. This is just one small aspect of the violations. The other violations are numerous, so many it's hard to count. Not to mention the other HUGE one that they violated and what brought the Calif Dept of Ed into the picture is when they were charged with child abuse and child neglect and child endangerment when they put my son into a prone containment when he has asthma which increases the likelihood of death dramatically. These issues alone are what is in one of the files that I posted here by the GOA of Selected Cases of Death and Child Abuse in public and private schools. Our case runs very deep wherein this school has violated so many laws not only the US Dept of Ed and IDEA laws but civil rights violations that is governed under Section 504.

Many states do not allow punitive damages in these cases but do allow for compensatory education and so forth. But the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals which Calif is governed by does allow for punitive damages in addition to other damages awarded. Unfortunately, there are many OAH hearings for Due Process and not many follow through into the civil arena either due to too much stress upon the parents and pursuing it or money has become an issue. Neither of these apply to me. Private insurance alone has forked about about 75,000 for care and treatment. In addition to that, I have forked out upwards of 25,000 to 30,000 for experts, attorneys, care and treatment for my son. I have a very specific goal in mind. One is to hit this school hard and damages inflicted upon them to force them to get into compliance and stop screwing with these kids and abusing these kids. I know too many parents that run and go into other districts or they just don't want to hunker down and deal with the problems at hand, running from reality if you will and anything to avoid getting entangled in disputes with the school districts. I am not one to run and stick my tail between my legs. I am a fierce fighter for what is right and I'll be damned if I give up and don't pursue justice for what is right. I can't sit idly by or to run when an injustice has been inflicted upon me or my loved ones. If you fuck with me, you're in for one hell of a fight because I do not give up and I will use every avenue available to me in pursuit of JUSTICE. Let's put it this way, they messed with the wrong mom and barked up the wrong tree. We already have them by the necks against the wall and I will as well as my attorneys will continue to keep that grip very tight until all air is cut off. Am I angry? You better believe it. Do I know what the laws are and the violations are? You better believe it. Although angry, that anger is what drives my determination to fight for JUSTICE.

Although you say that a lot of parents lose when fighting these schools, it is true to an extent but not always the case. In general education and all the BS there, yes, only do they win when there are serious violations of civil rights. But special ed is totally different, one example:

http://www.wrightslaw.com/advoc/articles/news_Whitehead_980403.htm

There are many other cases out there wherein it goes both ways. Most recent case in OC was a down syndrome child whose rights were violated and the judge awarded the parents and child 750,000. Yeah, steep but you know what, it got that school district's shit together and to get into compliance and stop abusing these kids. Given that my son could have died on Feb 9th at the hands of 4 school personnel is a very serious matter. This school's and school district's failures are immense against my son and my family, not only has his civil rights been violated but so have ours. Another example, LBUSD was hit very hard with a very large suit against them quite a number of years ago where the district lost big time. But because of the outcome of that suit, they are now considered one of the better schools for children with disabilities in the state of Calif because they don't want to go through another suit such that they did. There are other cases out there that I can search and look for you but I'm just too damned tired right now. It's a long hard road and tonight was to be my downtime, much needed. I'm not saying that this is going to be easy because it's not and it's going to be a challenge and a struggle but I am also fighting for my son's life and what they did to him. I will not allow the perpetrators to walk free and allowed to continue their behavior without ever suffering the consequences of their actions. It doesn't work that way with me.

But you are most correct, general ed, there has to be major violations of civil rights. With special ed, the parents and other professionals control how the child is to be educated, treated, how they are to be taught, in what setting they are to be taught, the quality of their teachers, and so forth. Special needs kids are treated as unique individuals with their own unique educational needs and this is written out in black and white in the laws. General ed, they are all grouped together and seen as one entity rather than individuals with unique needs, the children have very little control, parents have very little control BUT if you know the system and the laws, there's always ways to work around it.

Adam,

I got your message and will be writing soon. A third pair of eyes from a mediator's perspective may help. I can guarantee you that your mouth will probably drop once you hear all the details of what they've done. They are running scared now. And on top of it, as my attorneys have said, we haven't even pulled our big guns out yet; what are they going to do then. LMAO bwahahaha Yes, I can be evil, but evil for all the right reasons. I want god damn JUSTICE. Messed with the wrong set of women!!! But right now, still a lot going on and needing to take a bit of a break from all this just for a couple of days. Weekend is a bit of my time but on Monday, it'll all start all over; that is, until we file our first DP against them wherein the likelihood there will be no mediation nor confidential settlement. We are taking it all the way through Due Process and then right into the civil arena.

You guys have a great night and I am in much need of rest and off to bed finally.

Angie