George H. Smith

Americans Get Majority of Exercise While Drunk

Recommended Posts

<iframe frameborder="no" width="480" height="270" scrolling="no" src="http://www.theonion.com/video_embed/?id=18198"></iframe><br /><a href="http://www.theonion.com/video/study-americans-get-majority-of-exercise-while-dru,18198/" target="_blank" title="Study: Americans Get Majority Of Exercise While Drunk">Study: Americans Get Majority Of Exercise While Drunk</a>

Ghs

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Don't drink and fly!

dead-runk-duck.jpg

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Don't drink and fly!

dead-runk-duck.jpg

Did that duck shart itself?? Poor thing :P

~ Shane

P.S. We know that duck quacks don't echo...do their farts? Hmmm...

Edited by sbeaulieu

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

<iframe frameborder="no" width="480" height="270" scrolling="no" src="http://www.theonion.com/video_embed/?id=18198"></iframe><br /><a href="http://www.theonion.com/video/study-americans-get-majority-of-exercise-while-dru,18198/" target="_blank" title="Study: Americans Get Majority Of Exercise While Drunk">Study: Americans Get Majority Of Exercise While Drunk</a>

Ghs

You never looked better, George.

--Brant

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

George wrote:

Study: Americans Get Majority Of Exercise While Drunk.

end quote

First off, what's with all the caps George?

Secondly, I don't believe your comment for a second, especially after your recent letter about getting “jacked up” and exercising with your friend. I took you for a cork, not screw-top, wine aficionado, not a bourbon drinking hillbilly.

George you are trying to pull my leg, which is also exercise if done repetitiously?

Pull! Let go. Pull! Let go. Repeat ten times.

Oh, oh??? Was there something homo-erotic in your “jacked up” letter? And now this “pull your leg” letter? Well, by golly, you won’t be pulling any appendages of mine, especially the appendage I lovingly call, “Little Pete.”

The video was pretty funny.

Peter

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

George wrote:

Study: Americans Get Majority Of Exercise While Drunk.

end quote

First off, what's with all the caps George?

The title with caps appeared automatically with the embedded video.

Secondly, I don't believe your comment for a second, especially after your recent letter about getting “jacked up” and exercising with your friend. I took you for a cork, not screw-top, wine aficionado, not a bourbon drinking hillbilly.

I referred to a bottle of Jack, not to getting "jacked up." And Jack Daniel's is whiskey, not bourbon.

I've never cared much for the taste of any alcoholic beverage, including wine and beer. I use alcohol as I would use any drug, i.e., for the effect. I drink to get drunk, or at least tipsy. This is why I generally prefer hard liquor to wine and beer. It is more efficient.

Ghs

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

What's the difference between whiskey and bourbon? (And I thought I knew, if not everything, everything worth knowing.)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

What's the difference between whiskey and bourbon? (And I thought I knew, if not everything, everything worth knowing.)

Technically, bourbon is a type of whiskey. For more details, go here.

Ghs

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

George H. Smith wrote:

I use alcohol as I would use any drug, i.e., for the effect. I drink to get drunk, or at least tipsy. This is why I generally prefer hard liquor to wine and beer. It is more efficient.

End quote

From the Net:

Gin Makes You Cry, Bubbly Makes You Flirt, Tequila Makes You Violent, Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker: Alcohol Myths? Despite common lore, there's no evidence that different kinds of alcohol elicit different moods. Intriguingly, there's evidence our expectations heavily influence how alcohol transforms us. Psychologist Alan Marlatt set up a fake bar at the University of Washington, plied volunteer students with either real alcoholic drinks or taste-identical substitutes, and observed their behavior. The students who drank a substitute under the impression it was the real thing, felt, and behaved, as if they were really drunk. They were louder, flirting, standing up and feeling dizzy, despite being stone-cold sober.

End quote

Its all in your head? Could you be arrested for fake drunk driving?

I don’t know George. Perhaps whiskey and bourbon are the same because they taste the same. Bourbon is just sweeter. If you are not fond of the taste, it may be you need to dampen the sweetness.

I remember a Science Fiction novel by, was it Heinlein, or in John W. Campbell’s “Astounding” or “Analog” Sci Fi magazine? Anyway, a veteran of a future war is home on leave and his usual way to let off steam is to get rip roaring drunk, which usually ends up with him being demoted or put in jail.

He does not want to be demoted again, yet, he thinks he needs a “drunk” to avoid flashbacks to battle, so he checks into a clinic where they attach an alcohol drip to his arm and he stays drunk under a nurse’s supervision for a week or so, recovers without a hangover or a jail cell and heads back to his unit.

Christine O’Donnell’s “I am not a witch, I am you,” commercial just came on. She is really likeable (and do-able. Now. she would be fun to ply with alcohol, and have her climbing all over you - exercising of course!)

I think the following works the same in “mature” men, but the upper positive limit seems to be around three ounces of ethanol. Damn. It would be hard to achieve the Zen state of “Whoo Whoo! on just three shots of Jack. Notes:

McDougall, Graham. Older Women's Cognitive and Affective Response to Moderate Drinking. Presented at the meetings of the National Congress on the State of Science in Nursing Research. Washington, D.C., October 7-8,2004; University of Texas at Austin. Moderate drinking in older adult women has positive influence on memory. News release, October 3, 2004.

Semper cogitans fidele,

Peter Taylor

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

What would have sold that commercial by O'Donnell and knocked it out of the park would have been if at the end, she would have looked straight into the camera, "with a twinkle in her eye", wrinkled her nose and "puff" disappeared!

That would have shown how absurd the issue is with a sense of humor which would have capitalized on a great show in peoples memories.

As a point of fact, by the way, tequila has psychotropic elements in its root base.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks for the SNL spoof of Palen, Adam.

(Edit: I can't believe I wrote Palen. Of course I meant O'Donnell. Well they are two of the prettiest woman around, and not just those in Politics.)

I think that if she did a commercial with the "Bewitched" elements you mentioned, then people would not take her seriously. I am only half kidding, because it is hard to take her seriously at times.

I know, I know, it was a Halloween Show where she said the “I knew someone who was into Wicca” on TV, but crikee, why do all young people crave celebrity at the cost of their dignity? She was “allowed” on that Ding Dong’s show because Maher found her an easy target: the naïve, religious right winger, and it has come back to haunt her.

It’s looking a bit grim in Delaware, and I hear it is grim in California. We shall see. In the meantime Realclearpolitics is showing huge Republican gains in the House but there are too many seats “up for grabs” in the Senate, to call for a sure Republican majority.

My most recent AARP newsletter said 54 percent of under 50’s are sure to vote while 80 percent of the over 50 years of age folks are going to vote.

Semper cogitans fidele,

Peter Taylor

Edited by Peter Taylor

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks for the SNL spoof of Palen, Adam.

I think that if she did a commercial with the "Bewitched" elements you mentioned, then people would not take her seriously. I am only half kidding, because it is hard to take her seriously at times.

I know, I know, it was a Halloween Show where she said the "I knew someone who was into Wicca" on TV, but crikee, why do all young people crave celebrity at the cost of their dignity? She was "allowed" on that Ding Dong's show because Maher found her an easy target: the naïve, religious right winger, and it has come back to haunt her.

It's looking a bit grim in Delaware, and I hear it is grim in California. We shall see. In the meantime Realclearpolitics is showing huge Republican gains in the House but there are too many seats "up for grabs" in the Senate, to call for a sure Republican majority.

My most recent AARP newsletter said 54 percent of under 50's are sure to vote while 80 percent of the over 50 years of age folks are going to vote.

Semper cogitans fidele,

Peter Taylor

Peter:

The SNL takeoff was of O'Donnell not Palen.

Second, the Senate is very much up for grabs. See below:

http://www.realclear...revious_changes

Bennet, Reid and Murray are in serious trouble.

Boxer should be defeated, but that will be a turnout race.

Kirk is ahead barely in Illinois and Giannoulias had an awful appearance today on one of the main stream morning shows.

Finally, West Virginia will almost certainly go Republican.

A four (4) to two (2) split puts it at 50 - 50 with the dumbest Vice President in history being the deciding vote. However, for all intents and purposes the agenda can be stopped cold because it would be cloture proof.

Now if Boxer, Murray go down. O'Donnell wins, Gillibrand [Hillary Rodam Rodam's seat] in NY goes down and Blumenthal [i was not even in Vietnam lying sack of shit] in Conn. to McMahon.

Now it would be 55 - 45 and with a little serious pressure, we might be able to pick off, an additional number of votes on certain issues to shut down debate with the magic 60 votes.

Adam

burning incense to the Tsunami Gods, Goddesses and other gargoyles, images and icons!

Edited by Selene

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Grill that duck for me, basted in apricot/peach sauce.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...