How We Came to What We Love


Philip Coates

Recommended Posts

> so far you’ve been laudably congenial towards the offerings, I credit this as resulting from behavior modification achieved by yours truly [sir Laffsalot]

Clearly! :) Kudos, but the needle holes haven't healed yet and I'm still suffering a bit from the electroshock so I still get twitchy every time you post.

Edited by Philip Coates
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 136
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Angie: "Phil, it's funny that you ask the question that you did and it's truly so overly broad because there are so many loves and passions that I have as well as I am sure others, how I came to them and makes me who I am that stem from my childhood and throughout adulthood." [Post #23]

Yes, it was very broad. I wanted to get people to talk about any one of them, and figured that way it sort of gave free rein to go in any direction and about any 'grand passion' in life and not necessarily just a productive career.

Angie: "I sit here and think about all the things that I have truly enjoyed and one strange one perhaps for others is that of beading. I have Cherokee Indian in me and this was something that my grandmother, now deceased unfortunately, had gotten me into when I was very young...picked it up again in my 20s for quite a while...I've thought about taking it up again just as a hobby, nothing serious, etc., as it is quite fun and addicting to play around with."

I can completely see that, Angie. Maybe it would remind you of happy days when you were young - also combined with seeing something pretty taking shape that you are responsible for?

When I was a kid I had several things I'd like to experience again: certain children's books and, -- here's something that would be silly to anyone else -- from when we lived in Japan, a five inch tall fierce tin gorilla. When you shot rubber tipped darts at it, and hit the center ring, its little red eyes would light up, it would lift its arms up to the sky and fill the house with a shriek for ten or twenty seconds. I could spend hours lying on the carpet with that thing and, if they still made them, I'd cross the Sahara to have one again. If I throw a party, instead of an opening prayer, I'd like to have everyone take a turn and shoot at the gorilla and have it raise its arms and scream to whatever gods might be. Once we got all the darts out of the fruit salad we could start to eat. I'm a big believer in ceremony.

(As far as crafts or doing things with my hands, I used to. I liked to build things from kits (airplanes, erector sets), but I don't have the love for that any more I don't think.)

There are two sayings, "you're a big boy now" and "put aside childish things". I couldn't disagree more.

Edited by Philip Coates
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ninth:

I made a sound suggestion about how to keep this thread from dying. It turns out to have worked, though I believe the contributions have been offered more in a spirit of pity than interest inspired by your original request. And so far you’ve been laudably congenial towards the offerings, I credit this as resulting from behavior modification achieved by yours truly. He shoots he scores! Goal for the Doctor, credit Jonathan with the assist. We’ll see how long it lasts.

Just to let you know, I didn't post out of pity. I posted out of interest, truly I did, and needing a bit of a detour from some things. It was just finding the time to post to this thread and choosing exactly what I want to reveal of how I came to be, my loves and passions, etc. Shane's post started it off great for me -- kinda sorta the ripple effect. How one "rock" if you will that is dropped into that pond or lake and then the waves that generate out from that one event and how others react to it. It's been a nice breather and change of pace for me from homefront stuff and work with this thread now. I'm working a lot and have some other things going, aftereffects from the party last weekend (which was absolutely AMAZING) and some things that happened, so this thread has been a nice detour if you will for now.

Well, these emoticons suck the big one. LOL I was going to say relax a bit, although I don't know the full nature of your dealings with Phil up to this point (not pleasant obviously) but wanted to give hugs and kisses emoticons but they're not working. Oh well!!! I guess xoxoxoxo !!!!! Relax and enjoy!!!!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

How long have you been in the air force? What exactly is it that you do?

I enlisted back in '93. I had been accepted twice to University of Nebraska Lincoln to their English program. Full-time jobs were nowhere to be found, and because of a paperwork error I was unable to get a loan to go there. My dreams were dashed. And so, into the Air Force I went.

The work I do for the Air Force is communications, troubleshooting specifically. I started in tactical comm, then moved to long-haul voice and data circuits, and thankfully landed in networking. I've been doing that since '97 and haven't looked back. I've built deployed networks and did a four-year stint as an instructor teaching protocol analysis (very geeky stuff...especially when you can read data packets in hex!). For the past couple years, I've been the computer guy for my directorate, so now I'm somewhat computer savvy. I came into this job so that I'd have a marketable trade that I could always lean on. In 3 or so years, I'll retire and try to find work or make my own. Somewhere in there, I'll set down roots and get to writing.

Interesting subject about forensics! I love those types of shows. Dr. G is the bomb and I appreciate her all the more since she is a human troubleshooter :)

~ Shane

Wow, that sucks about the whole schooling deal but love the alternative. I thought very seriously when going into college about joining the reserves and getting my schooling paid that way but I ultimately decided not to.

I'm not 100 percent sure of this but have you thought about furthering your "education" through the Air Force in the area that you specialize in?

So when you do get out, you'll have that degree, etc. That's also something similar to one of the reasons I chose to be a court reporter -- what other areas can I go into with that education? To my surprise, there's quite a bit of opps that it opens up for me. My extensive law background opens up opps in the legal field if I choose to stop working as a court reporter. The medical background is the same and can take a detour into this area. English is extensive so can always work in this arena, editor, etc. Many different areas. I had an opp to work for the US Embassy I think in France but they were looking for someone that wasn't married at that time and without a kid. At that time it was offered to me, my situation fit both of those situations. Plus don't think I would do well being away from my son so much.

I absolutely enjoy forensics very much, especially involving medicine!! The forensic aspect of it though for me in psychology deals with profiling -- which would be going over crime scene photos, being present at the crime scene, the evidence, how methodical they are, what they do and how it is done, what they take -- you basically get into the head of the seriel killer, you create the potential profile of exactly who you are looking for, possible age, career, flamboyant, charismatic, and social or withdrawn and isolated, their interests and where you may find them and so forth. It's just basically tracking them down -- giving the profile to authorities on where to begin and they take it from there but you still are involved with the case until the conclusion of it.

A bit morbid aspect and if I should write about this but my fascination with these aspects is when serial killer Richard Ramirez back in the 80s was in my neighborhood, killed a lady down the street from us. Unsettling knowing that it could have been your house instead of hers. He killed another person and dumped her body behind the building where my mom had worked at that time. Everybody was on extreme edge like you wouldn't believe. That started my fascination with these types of people and what makes them tick and why.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Phil:

I can completely see that, Angie. Maybe it would remind you of happy days when you were young - also combined with seeing something pretty taking shape that you are responsible for?

Yes, it does remind me of happy days with her. She was a trippy lady and fun to be around. I was very close with both of my grandmothers, especially my dad's mom towards the end. Some absolutely amazing profound shit going on with the latter and still to this day BLOWS me away. Wow is all I can say. Her death was a huge turning point in my life in regards to my father and family. I'll never forget that day. EVER Although revealing, it was also some freaky freaky stuff. Even my dad and the others at the funeral parlor said that I literally turned ghost white, it took my breath away, looking down at her in the casket and what I saw and what it meant to me and my father. WOW. I remember taking a step back and being absolutely floored and my sister coming up to me and placing her hand on my chest wanting to feel my heart beating and she said, "I need to make sure you're alive, you look exactly like her." This had many meanings to it because everyone had noticed. But primary was that it confirmed that my father truly was my father. There had always been doubt and something that was made fun of for the longest time, jokingly, no biggie. It didn't matter if he was my biological father. He was the man that was in my life as a child and that was that. Everyone at the parlor had already seen my grandmother in the casket and there were so many whispers throughout the room. Some had approached me and started to talk to me, in a round about way telling me not to go over to the casket. My dad was going to say something but ultimately chose not to.

I remember finally walking up and I could see my dad off to the side watching me because he knew already what I was to see. I got to the casket and looked down and literally took my breath away. It was ME in the casket. I looked exactly like her. It was hard to tell for so many years because she was a heavy set woman but cancer stripped her down to being very very thin. I'm a pretty petite person. My heaviest was about 140 or so but not heavy heavy. I'm 5 foot 7. I'm 125 now and about the same weight I was when I saw her in the casket. Seeing her there, our facial structure, lips, everything was the fucking same, forehead, spacial set between the eyes, nose. I remember taking a step back and thinking to myself, "My god, my father is truly my father. This is the last thing that my grandmother did for me and that was to show me that I am truly hers." I looked over at my dad and he was in tears. And then my uncle whom I hadn't seen in 20 years showed up unexpectedly and came up to me where I was sitting next to my father at the very front of the room and he addressed me as my sister (my sister and dad are the same in so many ways but always the doubt with me) My uncle on my mom's side saw my grandmother in the casket and he then addressed me as though I was my sister so this was even more of a blow to me and absorbing all that happened.

After it was over, I left. They were going to go after me. It was so much for me and my entire family to take in and what happened at the parlor. But my dad and stepmom stopped everyone and my dad said, "Let her go. She's been through a lot today and needs to absorb it all and to think." I wandered in the country pouring down rain that night for many many hours, thinking about everything. When I finally came back to the hotel soaking wet, I went into the room where my dad and stepmom were and sat at the edge of the bed and a long very profound convo took place between myself and my dad. Some amazing stuff. Honestly, makes me teary eyed now thinking about it. Such a huge tragedy but so many beautiful things came from it. There's so much more to this story but there it is.

When I was a kid I had several things I'd like to experience again: certain children's books and, -- here's something that would be silly to anyone else -- from when we lived in Japan, a five inch tall fierce tin gorilla. When you shot rubber tipped darts at it, and hit the center ring, its little red eyes would light up, it would lift its arms up to the sky and fill the house with a shriek for ten or twenty seconds. I could spend hours lying on the carpet with that thing and, if they still made them, I'd cross the Sahara to have one again. If I throw a party, instead of an opening prayer, I'd like to have everyone take a turn and shoot at the gorilla and have it raise its arms and scream to whatever gods might be. Once we got all the darts out of the fruit salad we could start to eat. I'm a big believer in ceremony.

I don't think I have ever seen this toy, but perhaps as it triggers a vague memory of such a gorilla. LOL It's funny because when I was very very young I used to read Judy Bloom books. Books for growing girls if you will. There was a book of hers - don't remember the name now - but there was a technique that the characters would do and that was to put your hands together in front of you with your elbows out and pressing your hands together to work the muscles in the chest and then you chant "We must, we must, we must increase our bust." LOL We all did it. I think I may have done it way too much. LMAO Oh, god, that's just soooo funny to me and makes smile and laugh now. Talk about a bit of an emotional roller coaster with this posting from what happened with my grandma and getting teary eyed writing about it and remembering it to now and then laughing and smiling because of the chant we all girls did because of that book!!!!! *sighing* Amazing life, no doubt.

Edited by CNA
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm not 100 percent sure of this but have you thought about furthering your "education" through the Air Force in the area that you specialize in?

I currently have two associates: Electronic Technologies & Instructor of Technology and Military Sciences. I plan on getting a bachelors in the first, and then possibly a masters in humanities (a base foundation for writing through studies in philosophy, psychology, sociology, etc.) If I get another gig in instructing next year, I might try for a bachelors in teaching. I absolutely loved that job.

The forensic aspect of it though for me in psychology deals with profiling -- which would be going over crime scene photos, being present at the crime scene, the evidence, how methodical they are, what they do and how it is done, what they take -- you basically get into the head of the seriel killer, you create the potential profile of exactly who you are looking for, possible age, career, flamboyant, charismatic, and social or withdrawn and isolated, their interests and where you may find them and so forth. It's just basically tracking them down -- giving the profile to authorities on where to begin and they take it from there but you still are involved with the case until the conclusion of it.

That would be a kickass job. I'm sure it would come with a lot of emotional baggage to see what depths some humans will go to, but knowing that you had a hand in putting them away for good...that would be the balance.

A bit morbid aspect and if I should write about this but my fascination with these aspects is when serial killer Richard Ramirez back in the 80s was in my neighborhood, killed a lady down the street from us. Unsettling knowing that it could have been your house instead of hers. He killed another person and dumped her body behind the building where my mom had worked at that time. Everybody was on extreme edge like you wouldn't believe. That started my fascination with these types of people and what makes them tick and why.

I think a majority of law enforcement go into the field for that very reason...some event that hit close to home. It's akin to charities that people invest money and time into. There was a specific personal impact that got them involved. Although I feel bad about those victims, I'm thankful you weren't one of them.

~ Shane

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It was ME in the casket. I looked exactly like her.

I had a similar occurrence, although in a different manner.

My grandfather, like many grandfathers, was part of the Omaha beach landing. He used to drive howitzer munitions from the rear lines up to the artillery positions. Prior to the invasion, there was a picture that was taken with my grandfather's company along with the British counterparts. I remember my dad handing me the picture and asking me to do the whole "find Waldo". I scoured the faces and it didn't take long to find him. The kicker was that the guy sitting right next to him looked just like me. The only non-resemblance was the ears. I caught my breath. I asked my dad to look at the picture and tell me who was sitting next to him. He caught his breath too!

I have to say that your experience would have left me shaken for days!

Phil, I'll have a go at the gorilla! Haha!

~ Shane

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm not 100 percent sure of this but have you thought about furthering your "education" through the Air Force in the area that you specialize in?

I currently have two associates: Electronic Technologies & Instructor of Technology and Military Sciences. I plan on getting a bachelors in the first, and then possibly a masters in humanities (a base foundation for writing through studies in philosophy, psychology, sociology, etc.) If I get another gig in instructing next year, I might try for a bachelors in teaching. I absolutely loved that job.

Since you've spent so much time in the Air Force, and I may be misunderstanding because of so many posts up to this point, do you have the intentions of leaving the Air Force? If you've been in for so long, I would think you would have the intentions of staying in until retirement. Unless, you are close to retiring anyway which I don't think because I've looked at your profile and you're the same age I am or close to it. But then again????

The forensic aspect of it though for me in psychology deals with profiling -- which would be going over crime scene photos, being present at the crime scene, the evidence, how methodical they are, what they do and how it is done, what they take -- you basically get into the head of the seriel killer, you create the potential profile of exactly who you are looking for, possible age, career, flamboyant, charismatic, and social or withdrawn and isolated, their interests and where you may find them and so forth. It's just basically tracking them down -- giving the profile to authorities on where to begin and they take it from there but you still are involved with the case until the conclusion of it.

That would be a kickass job. I'm sure it would come with a lot of emotional baggage to see what depths some humans will go to, but knowing that you had a hand in putting them away for good...that would be the balance.

Yeah, no doubt. I've read some of this in regards to different serial killers (Richard Ramirez did some way out there wow freaky things) and eek and yikes as to what some of these people did and do. It's extremely disturbing to say the least. It's an interesting area for me. But when it comes down to it and actually pursuing it, I'm not sure how I would be able to do some of it. Of course, you get to know the killer themselves but you also become involved with the victim to an extent. If I was to pursue any given area of my interests thought, it would be in medicine and perhaps seismology above all other interests. Of course, Photography!!!

It was ME in the casket. I looked exactly like her.

I had a similar occurrence, although in a different manner.

Shane:

I have to say that your experience would have left me shaken for days!

Most definitely. But amazing everything that pursued thereafter!!! There's much more to the story and what was talked about that night. It's no doubt a trip. :)

Edited by CNA
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Since you've spent so much time in the Air Force, and I may be misunderstanding because of so many posts up to this point, do you have the intentions of leaving the Air Force? If you've been in for so long, I would think you would have the intentions of staying in until retirement. Unless, you are close to retiring anyway which I don't think because I've looked at your profile and you're the same age I am or close to it. But then again????

I have 17.25 years in (yes, I count the months!) and plan on retiring in 3 years or so. I'll find out if I make MSgt next week. Retirement takes what they call high three, essentially the average of your last 3 years before retiring. It's been a great ride but there are other roads I wish to travel for myself.

~ Shane

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Since you've spent so much time in the Air Force, and I may be misunderstanding because of so many posts up to this point, do you have the intentions of leaving the Air Force? If you've been in for so long, I would think you would have the intentions of staying in until retirement. Unless, you are close to retiring anyway which I don't think because I've looked at your profile and you're the same age I am or close to it. But then again????

I have 17.25 years in (yes, I count the months!) and plan on retiring in 3 years or so. I'll find out if I make MSgt next week. Retirement takes what they call high three, essentially the average of your last 3 years before retiring. It's been a great ride but there are other roads I wish to travel for myself.

~ Shane

I gotcha. I'm not familiar enough with this aspect. Counting the days down, uh?!?! :) I know you're anticipating to begin writing. What path do you anticipate taking? Do you have any goals set for when you do finally retire? Small goals? that lead up to your main goal and your personal success and achievement?

You live in Hawaii? OMG, photographers dream for me to be surrounded with so much lush beauty!!! I lived in Hawaii for a brief time when I was very young. Where exactly are you? The main island? Funny but I've actually had thoughts of moving to Alaska just for a brief time though.

With photography, I was always the last person to be given the camera to take pictures. Yikes. Now though, everyone hands me the camera. LOL Over this last weekend and at that party, a friend there handed over their 7D to me to take pictures. Wow, I have to admit it made me miss my 5D Mark II and the detail caught, how crisp the images are and the quality. It's been so long. Not being familiar with the 7D camera, it took me a while to figure it out and still didn't figure it out in the brief time I had it but I ended up being more interested in other aspects rather than being the documenter so to speak. But Hedley, an old timer there, helped refresh my memory a bit as much as he could which didn't help much though because he doesn't deal with the cams that I am used to. He has a Hasselblad, amazing camera. As the party continued and my having fun with the camera along with my frustrations with it, he came up to me drunk and said, "What's up with the camera, man; you figuring it out yet?" I responded with a giggle and said, "Well, I'm trying." He said, "Did you reading the fucking RTFIs, man?" I said, "What the hell are the RTFIs," assuming it was a term in photography from the old times. He said, "Read The Fucking Instructions" and started to laugh and walk away. I started to laugh and told him, "I don't have the fucking RTFIs, man." LMAO But Wow, I would have a hayday in Hawaii and all the photo opps!!!!! The sunsets and sunrises have to be spectacular!!!!!!! I have a shot taken down in San Onofre by the nuclear power plant that was completely surreal and felt as if I was on another planet when taking the shot. As the sun started to set, the entire beach, water, etc., had this red hue to it. It was absolutely amazing. In looking through the view finder, I found my heart rate increasing and what I was seeing through it that I had to take the cam down from my face just to see it without viewing it through the cam. Beautiful and I think is one of my fave shots from that trip!!!!!!

How long have you lived in Hawaii?

So much for keeping the thread on track but it seems we're the only two interested in talking and getting to know those on OL so thank you, Shane!!! I guess I'll throw in another passion of mine and that is candles. I played around with it for a while and making my own which is fun but no doubt a passion for them. I love the lighting it creates, the soft glow, the ambience. Have never liked harsh lighting. I don't quite know where this passion came from. Do know it started very young though. Burnt my dresser down when I was maybe 10 or 11. :blink: My guinea pigs at that time, poor things (you know me and my animal thing) were freaking out when the dresser went up in flames. But their freaking out warned everyone in the house that some crazy ass shit was going on in my room. :) :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

> So much for keeping the thread on track but it seems we're the only two interested in talking and getting to know those on OL so thank you, Shane!!!

Angie, I am going to answer the other question you asked me earlier, and particularly the second one as it applies to this thread -->

"How about some more info about yourself? What other passions and loves do you have? What makes you tick so to speak? " I just haven't had a chance yet because I think it might be long.

--Phil :)

Edited by Philip Coates
Link to comment
Share on other sites

> So much for keeping the thread on track but it seems we're the only two interested in talking and getting to know those on OL so thank you, Shane!!!

Angie, I am going to answer the other question you asked me earlier, and particularly the second one as it applies to this thread -->

"How about some more info about yourself? What other passions and loves do you have? What makes you tick so to speak? " I just haven't had a chance yet because I think it might be long.

--Phil :)

Totally understand. I'm not going anywhere! Always patient and not pushy and demanding for a reply right this second. LOL At your leisure and timing for you! ;) I have more than my share of "floating" threads/posts that I've never gotten back around to for various reasons and/or have chosen not to continue with it.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Counting the days is close, but I'm not burning any bridges just yet. With this lousy economy, I'd be crazy to jump ship if all there is is water. But one of the reasons I chose communications was for its longevity on the outside. Everyone needs it and the shit breaks down often enough to need services like mine, or new companies standing up that need a network designed and built. So I do have a breadth of experience that should land me on solid ground once I punch out.

As for paths, I'll assume you mean writing? I'd like to try a variety of genres and not be type-cast (was that a pun? :rolleyes:) I have quite a few stories floating in my head. A few of them are sci-fi, a couple are fantasy, and one or two are thriller/horror ideas. Michael gave me a great idea a while back about running one of the stories as a graphic novel - Souldier Saga. I even bought software to get it started but I just have too many distractions at the moment. I have so many ideas, but need to find a way to best bring it out. I honestly don't have enough practice at it, so that impedes process, too. School first I say. Get some solid grounding with studies and research. Objectivism for me has been an anchor in all of this. It will be my hub to introducing many fundamentals in character conflicts and such. I look forward to the day when I can say...."got it!"

I am stationed in Oahu and have been here since mid '07. I won't bore you with all the oohs and ahs as it goes without saying. But my favorite views are the sunsets. I don't know if you have a Facebook account, but I do have pictures on there of a sunset at Waikiki beach near one of the piers. In a couple weeks, I'll be doing an outing with my co-workers and will definitely be snapping a bunch of pics. I'll be interested to see what you think. I do have one regret. I was stationed in Okinawa and one of the most beautiful things I'd see on a regular basis were god fingers through the clouds hitting off the water...amazing!

Candles = romance. Who doesn't like that? ;) A good friend of mine used to make them for a little side money.

~ Shane

Link to comment
Share on other sites

As for paths, I'll assume you mean writing? I'd like to try a variety of genres and not be type-cast (was that a pun? :rolleyes:) I have quite a few stories floating in my head. A few of them are sci-fi, a couple are fantasy, and one or two are thriller/horror ideas. Michael gave me a great idea a while back about running one of the stories as a graphic novel - Souldier Saga. I even bought software to get it started but I just have too many distractions at the moment. I have so many ideas, but need to find a way to best bring it out. I honestly don't have enough practice at it, so that impedes process, too. School first I say. Get some solid grounding with studies and research. Objectivism for me has been an anchor in all of this. It will be my hub to introducing many fundamentals in character conflicts and such. I look forward to the day when I can say...."got it!"

I don't read many novels. Well, at least not anymore. You made mention of thriller/horror. Have you ever read a book called Lie To Me? A friend of mine asked me to read it a number of years ago and so I did. It's not a book for everyone and can be rather graphic and disturbing but it is a thriller/horror/suspensful. Hard to predict the outcome as is so common in these types of books.

Lie To Me -- David Martin

I am stationed in Oahu and have been here since mid '07. I won't bore you with all the oohs and ahs as it goes without saying. But my favorite views are the sunsets. I don't know if you have a Facebook account, but I do have pictures on there of a sunset at Waikiki beach near one of the piers. In a couple weeks, I'll be doing an outing with my co-workers and will definitely be snapping a bunch of pics. I'll be interested to see what you think. I do have one regret. I was stationed in Okinawa and one of the most beautiful things I'd see on a regular basis were god fingers through the clouds hitting off the water...amazing!

I remember Hawaii pretty clearly. Beautiful there!!!! Although so young at the time, there are tons of pix and the sunsets and sunrises are gorgeous!! I do have a Facebook account but don't use it often. There's only a few pics up on FB though, not many.

It took me a bit to reduce these, remove the watermark which identifies me on the internet and uploading to a site that I don't care if it is found but I'm hesitant to post the shots connected to the other site for very good reason obviously. The latter site is the one that I will eventually be working out of and want this site to remain anonymous for now for obvious reasons.

4631372726_96235e0a27.jpg

This is the shot from San Onofre. I was originally out there doing long exposure shots but as the sun kept going down and this beautiful reddish orange hue that enveloped everything, I quickly changed lenses, switched the shutter speed but not enough so the ocean is a bit blurred in the foreground from a longer than normal exposure but won't ever forget the night being out there. I don't mind going with people shooting but times I absolutely love being out there by myself and everything is left behind except me and my cam!!!

4631403800_0c807492cd.jpg

This is the typical shot and so common from Yosemite. But when there, you can't help but greatly admire the beauty!! It's kinda funny because on this trip I slipped into that damn river while taking a few shots. I need hazard pay is what it is. LOL But well worth it. Saved my cam though but not good at 10 degrees out soaking wet, 6 am, and no change of clothing other than a men's pair of pants in my car from the person that I was with. hehehehe, that was a sight and a half and thankfully no other photographers were out there at the time when I changed next to the river. :blink: LOL

Candles = romance. Who doesn't like that? ;) A good friend of mine used to make them for a little side money.

That's a given of course!!!! For me, I use them all the time, in the morning taking a shower and/or getting ready for work, during the day and the beautiful scent that fills the house, at night, etc.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Amazing shots, Angie! I have to admit, as much as I love Hawaii, I miss my home in Maine. There's nothing quite like the trifecta in New England where you have the spring of life, autumn with the multi-colored leaves, and then all the same trees in a blanket of snow. But winter is my favorite. The Yosemite picture makes me want to go there. Just beautiful.

I haven't read Lie To Me. But I have read quite a few of Dean Koontz's novels. He's good. I have a hard time putting his books down. The one I'd like to write is called Dream of the Soul Racers. It's one of the once-in-a-lifetime offers that the Devil hands out to those whose souls he possesses. This was a story concept of mine back in HS. But he puts them through a hellish obstacle course. If they win, they get to keep their souls, and the offer is good for life. But...what are the chances they'll make it? Hmmmm. And I promise to do my best to keep it more intellectual than gorey, but you have to throw in a carcass or two...haha!

~ Shane

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Subject: Passions

> "How about some more info about yourself? What other passions and loves do you [Phil] have? What makes you tick so to speak? " [Angie]

When I was a little kid, I loved to explore places, as far as I could go from home. This worked well as I was hyperactive (and noisy), even more than most kids. Have you ever seen those kids, usually boys, who are tugging on the poor mom's arm as if to tear it off in the supermarket? Or, they run around in cirles at high speed, yelling "vroom, vroom, vroom"?

We lived in the outskirts of San Diego for a while, and there was a lot to explore, both on a bicycle and on foot. There were little gullies and rocky hillsides and city dumps and even a nearby small mountain. I went everywhere on that bicycle and no hill seemed too step or garbage dump too smelly on foot.

Next came books. I had loved the little children's classics and 'Landmark' books they seem to have published throughout the first half of the century. Especially postwar, the 50's. But when I was ten I discovered science fiction. And that became a central passion for many years. My parents were so happy to see me quietly reading in a corner for long hours of peace and quiet. It was like they had suddenly acquired a different child who could sit without moving a muscle like a rock or a stone.

I was hell in the classroom. Never shut up. Never sit still. Never pay attention to the (boring) lesson. Disruptive. Army brat. Disrespectful of teachers and authority. How many kids do you know who were permanently kicked out of kindergarten? When we moved to Massachussets (best public schools on average in the nation, then and often now), my education had fallen behind. They put me in the "D" division, the very bottom rung of the Inferno out of four. For kids who weren't trying or were failing or lacked smarts. Future Garbage Disposal Men of America.

I was going nowhere. Highway to hell. [Phil sings it loudly in front of the keyboard..]

Things changed for me twice - in 8th grade and then in 10th grade. And this is where some lifelong passions started to stride in from the shadows. So many times in people's lives it's an English teacher who first reached out to them, who inspired them, who changed them. It was for me. In Seventh? grade I had published a poem that impressed teachers and parents in the school newspaper. In 8th grade, Mrs. D thought she saw potential and that I wasn't a total retard. She had the school put me in - her - "A" division.

She was a tiny, demanding woman with a really loud voice. She scared some of the kids and even made the principals run and hide, but I loved her. She cast me in the school play twice and that's probably what blew on the tiny sparks and kept the flame from dying entirely of my love for words and for the English language.

In the tenth grade, I took geometry and it was the most orderly beautiful subject I'd ever taken. I had a great teacher, Mrs. H. And I was amazingly good at math, both in my classes and in statewide math contests. My parents found it peculiar that this was the area I was going to be so good at since both of them had been so terrible at it. And I loved word problems, particularly, even though they came up more in algebra than geometry. Math, rather than English set the course for the rest of the first half of my life.

(I don't know if this is interesting to people who don't know me, but hopefully I'll finish this later...)

Edited by Philip Coates
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Subject: Passions

We lived in the outskirts of San Diego for a while, and there was a lot to explore, both on a bicycle and on foot. There were little gullies and rocky hillsides and city dumps and even a nearby small mountain. I went everywhere on that bicycle and no hill seemed too step or garbage dump too smelly on foot.

Phil started out in a garbage dump! Now I'm impressed! But why am I not surprised?

--Brant

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Subject: An empty soul?

Brant has no positives -- no affirmative values, or life's passions -- to add to the thread. Why am I not surprised?

Edited by Philip Coates
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Subject: An empty soul?

Brant has no positives -- no affirmative values, or life's passions -- to add to the thread. Why am I not surprised?

I guess my humor offended you. If I had said this to you in person I'd have given you a playful shove on the shoulder. And did you bother to remember what else I wrote here?

--Brant

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I was never great at math, but I loved geometry! Speaking of word problems, Phil, did you ever play the card game Mind Trap? That's another love of mine...puzzles. Call it the troubleshooter in me :)

Do you still go on bike rides to revisit your childhood fun?

~ Shane

Link to comment
Share on other sites

> I guess my humor offended you. If I had said this to you in person I'd have given you a playful shove on the shoulder. [#44]

Brant, sorry: I took it more literally or as hostility or dislike than as humor. Here's the thing: In person you can tell if someone means something as just playful humor, but on the internet you don't see a smile or hear tone of voice which takes the sting out; you often have to go only on the words - unless there is a smiley. And, sometimes, on previous interactions: If someone has always said something undercutting about me as opposed to praise on virtually every thread on which I post, I think I'm pretty justified in assuming an underlying hostility. And feeling resentment that I don't deserve that. (Plus you've said things before like you wish I'd just leave OL, etc.)

Here's another point, which may or may not apply to you:

I tend to be too critical and a wise person once pointed out why I should always name the positives as well: If someone comes to you and they say something very negative (or belittling or contemptuous) and they never have commented on anything else previously (or never positively), you will probably react as if the balance or the overall were negative or hostile. But if someone has praised you or had a positive comment at any time in memory or even just acknowledged that you made a good point or had an insight from time to time, then the "balance", the total is not overwhelmingly negative or critical.

I remembered this when I was dealing with a friend who would only find something to comment on when it was something that was annoying or critical. And I try to remember it myself. It's actually more -just- if someone does 4 things that are worthy or praise or acknowledgement and 4 things worthy or criticism or that are in error to comment on two of each than only on the last four. Why? Because in fact the actions are more in balance than all negative and one's comments, to be just, should reflect that.

Edited by Philip Coates
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi Shane,

>...did you ever play the card game Mind Trap? That's another love of mine...puzzles.

Shane, I haven't heard of it. I used to play cards a lot in junior high and high school with my cronies - hearts mostly (and chess and "Go"). "Go" is the only game I miss. Right now my mother is in a nursing home - I moved to Florida to take care of her - and I've been doing crossword puzzles with her to try to fight off any mental decline. I don't enjoy them all that much, but they're ok. She likes it and her mind is much better than it was even six months ago because of the challenge.

> Do you still go on bike rides to revisit your childhood fun?

I've had a bike in several places I've lived as an adult and greatly enjoyed it. Maybe it's time again!

BTW, there is no greater joy than biking fast years ago through New York's Central Park and down Broadway from 59th street thru Times Square and down to work near Madison Square Garden (mid 30's?) when there is a transit strike and you are going faster than all the gridlocked taxis. Glory daze, glory daze, glory daze...

Edited by Philip Coates
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Well, Phil, I'm trying to get along with you and emulate George's lead. The topic has potential. I can see how my remarks could have been read differently than what I was trying to say. Even a smiley face might have been taken wrong. I probably shouldn't have made the post considering everything, but I don't use humor to attack people. It's something I don't have a knack for so when it seems to happen it's either accidental or my ID monster took over the controls--that's why Tokyo's burning. It's that damn radiation!

--Brant

Edited by Brant Gaede
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Amazing shots, Angie! I have to admit, as much as I love Hawaii, I miss my home in Maine. There's nothing quite like the trifecta in New England where you have the spring of life, autumn with the multi-colored leaves, and then all the same trees in a blanket of snow. But winter is my favorite. The Yosemite picture makes me want to go there. Just beautiful.

Thank you very much, Shane. I have similar but more interesting shots at the Dunes in Death Valley done with a Fish Eye lens and Tilt Shift lens. Some way trippy effects with a Tilt Shift, gives the impression of being miniaturized.

Way contrast to your favorite time of year. When I was last out there and took the one shot I'll post, it was about 120 degrees out. Death Valley is so well worth it and to deal with the heat and other hazards from wild life. So many opps there and can't wait to go back again. Hmmm....I don't think I have one on that other site with the Tilt Shift but may have one with a Fish Eye. Where I am at we don't get the four seasons if you will. But as much as I have travelled in the last 3 or 4 years, it makes where I live a bit drab but beauty still abounds in the most unusual of places!!

I'm always very critical of anything that I produce and how it can be improved or not entirely happy with the results and wanting to learn and get better with it. This shot below was processed in Lightroom, new software I was trying out. A bit saturated and one hell of a bitch calming the pinkish hues down. Everything I did to no avail. But much better at it now and processing the images from RAW format. The thing I like about this shot though is that I was maybe only two feet away from this bush if that. The Fish Eye is an extreme wide angle lens that gives 'curvature' to your shots, depending on how you hold the cam. I was kneeling down in front of it and kept getting my knees in the shot on the left and right side of the picture LOL

Unfortunately the watermark is still on the shot, doubled, because I got soooooo tired of people taking my work. I have the original but would have to dig it off of an external hard drive and would take me forever to find I am sure. So will post it anyway with the double watermark over it. Distracting but you may like it.

4633308177_04ca187c97.jpg

I haven't read Lie To Me. But I have read quite a few of Dean Koontz's novels. He's good. I have a hard time putting his books down. The one I'd like to write is called Dream of the Soul Racers. It's one of the once-in-a-lifetime offers that the Devil hands out to those whose souls he possesses. This was a story concept of mine back in HS. But he puts them through a hellish obstacle course. If they win, they get to keep their souls, and the offer is good for life. But...what are the chances they'll make it? Hmmmm. And I promise to do my best to keep it more intellectual than gorey, but you have to throw in a carcass or two...haha!

You may like Lie To Me. I tried reading Koontz once and just couldn't get through it. Read a lot of Stephen King though when I was way way young. Your idea for your book does sound quite interesting. Have you written anything at all, just for yourself, that you may want to consider posting here on OL? Or maybe you have already? I browse OL often and read but really taking the time to go through the site I don't do often. I will usually just scan real quick, looking for something that may perhaps interest me and then move on to the next.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Subject: Passions

> "How about some more info about yourself? What other passions and loves do you [Phil] have? What makes you tick so to speak? " [Angie]

When I was a little kid, I loved to explore places, as far as I could go from home. This worked well as I was hyperactive (and noisy), even more than most kids. Have you ever seen those kids, usually boys, who are tugging on the poor mom's arm as if to tear it off in the supermarket? Or, they run around in cirles at high speed, yelling "vroom, vroom, vroom"?

Oh, yeah, I've seen those kids up close and personal. My son CHRIS!!!!! Rambunctious like you wouldn't believe. He's calming down quite a bit though as he's getting older. I was the same way. Always on the go and exploring anything and everything and for the most part still this way.....curiosity and experiencing things firsthand is a wonderful thing!!!!! Also can't forget, gotta love the spirit and sense of life that all kids have, their love of life and enjoying it !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;)

We lived in the outskirts of San Diego for a while, and there was a lot to explore, both on a bicycle and on foot. There were little gullies and rocky hillsides and city dumps and even a nearby small mountain. I went everywhere on that bicycle and no hill seemed too step or garbage dump too smelly on foot.

Yep. Where I grew up, there were many abandoned houses, some in complete disarray, dilapidated but being kids that we were we had to go see and explore and play. Sometimes got into trouble though. I have one very vivid memory of myself and my sister and a bunch of other kids went over to this house that was on many acres, completely destroyed, not well kept, etc. We were playing in the tree house and swinging from the rope that lead to the ground from the tree house itself. It broke and my sister went crashing to the ground and to our surprise crashed and broke the wood that was covered up with dirt and got lodged in what obviously was underground tunnel ways. It was an interesting house no doubt. Unfortunately, the broken wood and nails tore into her thigh and impailed her leg something fierce. We tried to get her loose and couldn't so I went hauling ass home, running so fast tripping and falling a number of times, got bit twice by spiders, one rather large (I don't like spiders in the least bit because I've been bitten pretty badly in the past) but it didn't phase me at all and kept running to get my dad. We got her out but she ended up in the emergency repairing the damage done to her leg. Not a happy girl at all. Needless to say, we only went to that house maybe 2 or 3 times thereafter. But have so many stories of great adventures for us when we were kids and still have some pretty great adventures and experiences. My most recent comical one and a lot of fun was out in Yellowstone!!!!! Some funny funny stuff going on there. LOL

Next came books. I had loved the little children's classics and 'Landmark' books they seem to have published throughout the first half of the century. Especially postwar, the 50's. But when I was ten I discovered science fiction. And that became a central passion for many years. My parents were so happy to see me quietly reading in a corner for long hours of peace and quiet. It was like they had suddenly acquired a different child who could sit without moving a muscle like a rock or a stone.

hehehehe, my son is the same but that with science books. Get him to chill out for a bit, hand him a science book and he's glued to it. A bomb could go off outside and wouldn't phase him at all. Or if I interrupt him and his time, he'll get a bit irritated with me. He's such a cutie. Love him dearly.

I was going nowhere. Highway to hell. [Phil sings it loudly in front of the keyboard..]

Things changed for me twice - in 8th grade and then in 10th grade. And this is where some lifelong passions started to stride in from the shadows. So many times in people's lives it's an English teacher who first reached out to them, who inspired them, who changed them. It was for me. In Seventh? grade I had published a poem that impressed teachers and parents in the school newspaper. In 8th grade, Mrs. D thought she saw potential and that I wasn't a total retard. She had the school put me in - her - "A" division.

She was a tiny, demanding woman with a really loud voice. She scared some of the kids and even made the principals run and hide, but I loved her. She cast me in the school play twice and that's probably what blew on the tiny sparks and kept the flame from dying entirely of my love for words and for the English language.

Teachers make all the difference. Mr. Peralta was my science teacher in high school. We got a long really well. Out of my entire schooling through high school, he is the only one that inspired me and I thoroughly enjoyed his class. He was a great teacher. He knew the potential was there with me and did what he could to bring it out and he did!!!! But unfortunately, many other forces working against it, home, friends, myself, and some other things I was going through at that time, etc. Something had happened that I won't talk about here but I went running from his classroom down the hall (totally surreal) and he came running after me. I went into the girls bathroom and his telling me, "Please come out, I know there's something wrong, I can see it on your face, please come out," and my telling him, "No, leave me alone." Anyway....funny because I was thinking a few years back about going back to that highschool and giving him a visit!!!!!

(I don't know if this is interesting to people who don't know me, but hopefully I'll finish this later...)

Yes, please do write more!!!

Edited by CNA
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now