Why did the chicken cross the road???

[BaalChatzaf]

Why did the Chicken Cross the Road?

Kindergarden Teacher

: To get to the other side.

Timothy Leary

: Because that’s the only trip the establishment would let it take.

Saddam Hussein

: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

Jack Nicholson

: ‘cause it f.....g wanted to. That’s the f.....g reason.

Captain James T. Kirk

: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

Hippocrates

: Because of an excess of phlegm in its pancreas.

Arthur Andersen Consultant

: Deregulation of the chicken’s side of the road was threatening its dominant market position. The chicken was faced with significant challenges to create and develop the competencies required for the newly competitive market. Andersen Consulting, in a partnering relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking its physical distribution strategy and implementation processes. Using the Poultry Integration Model (PIM), Andersen helped the chicken use its skills, methodologies, knowledge, capital and experiences to align the chicken’s people, processes and technology in support of its overall strategy within a Program Management framework. Andersen Consulting convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and best chickens along with Anderson consultants with deep skills in the transportation industry to engage in a two-day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their personal knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to synergize with each other in order to achieve the implicit goals of delivering and successfully architecting and implementing an enterprise-wide value framework across the continuum of poultry cross-median processes. The meeting was held in a park-like setting, enabling and creating an impactful environment which was strategically based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear,and unified market message and aligned with the chicken’s mission, vision, and core values. This was conducive towards the creation of a total business integration solution. Andersen Consulting helped the chicken change to become more successful.

Louis Farrakhan

: The road, you see, represents the black man. The chicken ‘crossed’ the black man in order to trample him and keep him down.

Fox Mulder

: You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross the road before you believe it. RICHARD M. NIXON: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did NOT cross the road.

Freud

: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

Bill Gates

: I have just released the new Chicken Office 2000, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook.

Oliver Stone

: The question is not, "Why did the chicken cross the road?" Rather, it is, "Who was crossing the road at the same time, whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?"

Einstein

: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

Ernest Hemingway

: To die. In the rain.

Colonel Sanders

: I missed one?

[jts]

That is one of the most fowl jokes on the internet.

[BaalChatzaf]

That is one of the most fowl jokes on the internet.

Do I have egg on my face?