Frank's Niece!

[Selene]

You will get to enjoy the dictionary Cathy! If I was bored as a child I used to open it at random and read it...there was a lot of startling medical information in there!

Fascinating.

My parents were remarkable. As I have explained before, whenever I would ask what a word meant, my father. or, my mother would say. "That's a good question, let's go look it up." We would then go to the unabridged dictionary that was in the dining room on a wooden device that my father built. It kept the dictionary open so you would simply go to the first letter and explore our language.

Their methodology was so not threatening and so explorative that I never realized that my upbringing was so different from my contemporaries.

I was blessed and never realized that I was to have great parents.

A...

[Cathy]

You will get to enjoy the dictionary Cathy! If I was bored as a child I used to open it at random and read it...there was a lot of startling medical information in there!

Fascinating.

My parents were remarkable. As I have explained before, whenever I would ask what a word meant, my father. or, my mother would say. "That's a good question, let's go look it up." We would then go to the unabridged dictionary that was in the dining room on a wooden device that my father built. It kept the dictionary open so you would simply go to the first letter and explore our language.

Their methodology was so not threatening and so explorative that I never realized that my upbringing was so different from my contemporaries.

I was blessed and never realized that I was to have great parents.

A...

You had great parents...I liked their open book policy most, in more ways than it implies ~Cathy~

[Selene]

You had great parents...I liked their open book policy most, in more ways than it implies ~Cathy~

Thank you, from the bottom of my heart[always wondered about that symbolic aphorism].

It is not too late to buy an unabridged dictionary and use it.

A...

[caroljane]

There is a funny story about Jane and her oldest sister Beverly. One time Beverly was visiting Jane out of town and they were at dinner, when a couple of gentleman at a nearby table introduced themselves and joined them, asking them polite questions etc. "We're sisters," Jane told them (Jane and Beverly do not resemble each other in the slightest). Oh! said the guy, I should have "realized -- what order do you belong to?

He thought they were nuns. As Beverly said later, "It must have been the sensible shoes that tipped them off."

[Cathy]

You had great parents...I liked their open book policy most, in more ways than it implies ~Cathy~

Thank you, from the bottom of my heart[always wondered about that symbolic aphorism].

It is not too late to buy an unabridged dictionary and use it.

A...

I am finding out, its never to late for anything...thx. ~Cathy~

[caroljane]

You will get to enjoy the dictionary Cathy! If I was bored as a child I used to open it at random and read it...there was a lot of startling medical information in there!

Fascinating.

My parents were remarkable. As I have explained before, whenever I would ask what a word meant, my father. or, my mother would say. "That's a good question, let's go look it up." We would then go to the unabridged dictionary that was in the dining room on a wooden device that my father built. It kept the dictionary open so you would simply go to the first letter and explore our language.

Their methodology was so not threatening and so explorative that I never realized that my upbringing was so different from my contemporaries.

I was blessed and never realized that I was to have great parents.

A...

I know the feeling. I am not surprised that you and I have such an easy companionship in spite of the absolute differences of gender and nationality and ideology. We are first and maybe foremost, beings created by love and luck and circumstance.

[caroljane]

Btw Adam, are you close to any of your cousins now? Is there a My Cousin Vinny in the mix? Though through your work I guess you are fairly Vinnyish yourself.

[Selene]

I know the feeling. I am not surprised that you and I have such an easy companionship in spite of the absolute differences of gender and nationality and ideology. We are first and maybe foremost, beings created by love and luck and circumstance.

I am gender neutral. However, I do understand the "luck" of the genetic dice roll that we both won.

As to ideology, I can respect a person who is honest and fair in their point of view.

A...

[Selene]

Btw Adam, are you close to any of your cousins now? Is there a My Cousin Vinny in the mix? Though through your work I guess you are fairly Vinnyish yourself.

Yes there were a lot of close cousins. Unfortunately, I am outliving most of them. A plus and minus to longevity...

My two closest male cousins and I were basically brothers forever. Only one is left.

A...

[caroljane]

Btw Adam, are you close to any of your cousins now? Is there a My Cousin Vinny in the mix? Though through your work I guess you are fairly Vinnyish yourself.

Yes there were a lot of close cousins. Unfortunately, I am outliving most of them. A plus and minus to longevity...

My two closest male cousins and I were basically brothers forever. Only one is left.

A...

Such sadness. The joy of lifelong love is inevitably paid for by the end of one life. But the love remains.

[Selene]

Such sadness. The joy of lifelong love is inevitably paid for by the end of one life. But the love remains.

Carol:

I do not see it that way at all. I see joy and a lifetime of great experiences. I do not "feel" sadness at all.

A...

[caroljane]

Such sadness. The joy of lifelong love is inevitably paid for by the end of one life. But the love remains.

Carol:

I do not see it that way at all. I see joy and a lifetime of great experiences. I do not "feel" sadness at all.

A...

How wonderful that you can incorporate loss in that way. I am lucky that I can expect to have my cohort of cousins intact for the foreseeable future, the Stuart women are quite long-lived and though I have not lived as healthy a life as most of them, even taking the average of my two parents' lifespans I can feel secure of a decade or near of good company.

[Cathy]

Your mother had a nursing home! My closest cousin, more like a sister, was a gerontology specialist RN and ran a nursing home till her retirement. On retirement she and her husband took a road trip across the US in an open convertible, then visited their married sons in Vancouver and Japan, then went to Spain to walk the pilgrimage to St James of Compostela (they are devout Catholics) it was a fabulous experience and they made friends from all over Europe. Jane wants to go back visit them but her husband Donnie says nothing will get him away from home and his golf and curling again.

Though retired Jane works as much as ever, filling in nursing and assessing nursing homes across Canada, besides the social pleasures of her four children, nine siblings and eleven siblings-in-law, never mind all us cousins.

When she comes to Ontario I go to her hotel and we have a Cousins Gone Wild spa weekend, swimming, watching movies, drinking wine. laughing and yakking.

I always wanted a sister or brother and could not have had a better one than she is.

WOW Daunce, you come from a very big family! You don't have any brothers or sisters? I don't know what I would do without my sister. Yes my mother owned the Mecca Nursing Home in Media Ohio. It was always my home away from home. She was very successful in business...just not in marriages. She married my step father who was an alcoholic, but he was very good to us. But because my mother died when we were young, he went through all her money and our trust founds. My mother worked all her life for us and he drank it up in a few years. Before my step father died, he mailed my sister pictures of my mother, he died when we were fifteen. There's a lot I would have like to asked him also. A few years ago, me and my husband talked about moving to Canada. I even looked up a work visa for us. I wish we would have done it...now its impossible. You Canadians sure now how to have fun it sounds like! ~Cathy~

[ginny]

Is the father you've referred to your step-father?

[Ellen Stuttle]

Before my step father died, he mailed my sister pictures of my mother, he died when we were fifteen. There's a lot I would have like to asked him also.

Cathy, several questions:

Were your sister and you in separate foster homes? Did you learn of your step-father's death at the time? If so, how? Was your mother's side of the family able to track you, just not the O'Connor side? Did you and/or your sister ever try to contact the O'Connors?

Also, I've forgotten if you've ever mentioned anything about your maternal grandparents and when they died. Did they have any role in your childhood?

Ellen

[Cathy]

Before my step father died, he mailed my sister pictures of my mother, he died when we were fifteen. There's a lot I would have like to asked him also.

Cathy, several questions:

Were your sister and you in separate foster homes? Did you learn of your step-father's death at the time? If so, how? Was your mother's side of the family able to track you, just not the O'Connor side? Did you and/or your sister ever try to contact the O'Connors?

Also, I've forgotten if you've ever mentioned anything about your maternal grandparents and when they died. Did they have any role in your childhood?

Ellen

HI Ellen, Yes, we were in separate foster homes when my step father died...this was not my father. We didn't find out he died until much much later...then we found out he died not long after he sent the pictures. We were in our mid twenties by the time we found our mother's side of the family. We found them...they tried to find us and couldn't. No, me and Conny did not try to find the O'Connor side, other than my dad. Conny did have my father in her wedding when she was eighteen...I did not. When we were adults, we did try to have a relationship with our father...it was hard to do because of our step mother. Last time I remember seeing my father, me and Conny were both there. My step mother said something mean to us, and I said something mean back. She hit me and I sent her flying! She or her family did not call me to let me know my father died, we were 21. Both sides of my grand parents died before we were born. ~Cathy~

[Cathy]

Is the father you've referred to your step-father?

Yes Ginny, the one that mailed pictures to Conny was our step father ~Cathy~

[ginny]

Okay, you were raised by your mom and step-dad. Mom dies and step-dad can't handle it, so you guys go into foster care. Later, you find you bio dad, who is married to your step-witch.

Is this right? You could do a whole TV series on the twists and turns you went through. A series would be good, cause at the end, our Russian goddess could make an entrance smoking a cigarette. "You people are all irrational!!"

[Selene]

Cathy:

Generally, most folks have no clue as to the destruction of the American family over the last four (4) decades.

One of the true failures of big (O)bectivism completely avoids and evades children and families.

Your testimonial statements confirm my judgments.

A...

[Cathy]

Okay, you were raised by your mom and step-dad. Mom dies and step-dad can't handle it, so you guys go into foster care. Later, you find you bio dad, who is married to your step-witch.

Is this right? You could do a whole TV series on the twists and turns you went through. A series would be good, cause at the end, our Russian goddess could make an entrance smoking a cigarette. "You people are all irrational!!"

Yes, we were with my mom and step dad until we were eight. My mother got sick then my father came and got us. We lived with my father and step mother until we were thirteen, when my mother died. At thirteen we went into foster care...later we found our father who was still married to the step-witch lol. Its funny, but I can see her walking into a room with that thing on the end of her cigarette (and she always had it)...when she smoked, that cigarette would look a mile long to me ~Cathy~ I need to explain this better...at 8 my mom got sick. my dad came and got us. From 8 thru 13 we lived with my father and step mother waiting for our mother to get well and come get us. She died when we were 13. We knew there was nothing left for us to wait on at my fathers, so we ran away...a lot! Finally and thankfully, my dad took us and dropped us off at the detention home. After that we went into foster care. I got married at 17, conny got married at 18. We found our dad and Conny had him attend her wedding. We tried to have a relationship with our father....that did go so well. Hope I cleared things up a bit. ~Cathy~

[ginny]

You did. Thanks. Damn, that's a lot to go through. You two got married because you needed some kind of home. In effect, you were dealing with four parents who couldn't really be there. Was Agnes a part of your life throughout all of this?

[Cathy]

You did. Thanks. Damn, that's a lot to go through. You two got married because you needed some kind of home. In effect, you were dealing with four parents who couldn't really be there. Was Agnes a part of your life throughout all of this?

Aunt Agnes was always there until we were 12 or 13 when we got up that morning for school and she was gone. But Marna gave me a picture of her. ~Cathy~

[Cathy]

Okay, you were raised by your mom and step-dad. Mom dies and step-dad can't handle it, so you guys go into foster care. Later, you find you bio dad, who is married to your step-witch.

Is this right? You could do a whole TV series on the twists and turns you went through. A series would be good, cause at the end, our Russian goddess could make an entrance smoking a cigarette. "You people are all irrational!!"

Yes, we were with my mom and step dad until we were eight. My mother got sick then my father came and got us. We lived with my father and step mother until we were thirteen, when my mother died. At thirteen we went into foster care...later we found our father who was still married to the step-witch lol. Its funny, but I can see her walking into a room with that thing on the end of her cigarette (and she always had it)...when she smoked, that cigarette would look a mile long to me ~Cathy~ I need to explain this better...at 8 my mom got sick. my dad came and got us. From 8 thru 13 we lived with my father and step mother waiting for our mother to get well and come get us. She died when we were 13. We knew there was nothing left for us to wait on at my fathers, so we ran away...a lot! Finally and thankfully, my dad took us and dropped us off at the detention home. After that we went into foster care. I got married at 17, conny got married at 18. We found our dad and Conny had him attend her wedding. We tried to have a relationship with our father....that did not go so well. Hope I cleared things up a bit. ~Cathy~

[ginny]

how did Agnes disppear? Anoter major trauma. Was it part of the family feud?

[Cathy]

how did Agnes disppear? Anoter major trauma. Was it part of the family feud?

Yes...the night before the was a big argument between her and my step mother about how she treated me and my sister. When we got up for school the next morning there was a note on the table. We knew she wouldn't come back or be allowed back ~Cathy~