... walks into a bar ....

[syrakusos]

A horse walks into a bar.

The bartender says, "Why the long face?"

A sandwich walks into a bar.

The bartender says, "We don't serve food here."

A jump lead walks into a bar.

The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't try to start something."

A minister, a priest, and a rabbi walk into a bar.

The bartender says, "What is this, a joke?"

The bartender says, "We don't serve neutrinos here."

A faster-than-light neutrino walks into a bar.

[George H. Smith]

A conservative, a moderate, and a liberal walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Hi, Mitt!"

Ghs

[Selene]

Vote Libertarian and sleep morally when you come home from the voting booth!

[George H. Smith]

A guy and his dog walk into a bar. The guy orders drinks for himself and his dog.

The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve dogs here. But they serve them across the street."

So the guy gives his dog 20 dollars, tells him to go to the other bar and that he will see him later.

A couple hours later the guy leaves the bar, only to see his dog in the middle of the street humping another dog, with several other female dogs waiting in line.

The guys says, "I've never seen you do that before."

The dog replies, "I've never had 20 bucks before."

Ghs

[syrakusos]

An egotist walks into a bar and says, "These are my memoirs! Leave me the fuck alone!!"

[George H. Smith]

An egotist walks into a bar and says, "These are my memoirs! Leave me the fuck alone!!"

Bad move, Michael. Few people will know that you are referring one of my posts on a different thread, so they will simply think you are nuts.

God save us from fucking amateurs.

Ghs

[Brant Gaede]

An egotist walks into a bar and says, "These are my memoirs! Leave me the fuck alone!!"

Bad move, Michael. Few people will know that you are referring one of my posts on a different thread, so they will simply think you are nuts.

God save us from fucking amateurs.

Ghs

Can an egoist also be an egotist? Yes, if the psychological foundation is the former and he gets up on the wrong side of the bed and defaults into early morning before wash his face and before his coffee and donut superficiality. But egotism is no foundation for egoism. No gravitas.

--Brant

somewhere in the middle

king of blather

[George H. Smith]

An egotist walks into a bar and says, "These are my memoirs! Leave me the fuck alone!!"

Bad move, Michael. Few people will know that you are referring one of my posts on a different thread, so they will simply think you are nuts.

God save us from fucking amateurs.

Ghs

Can an egoist also be an egotist? Yes, if the psychological foundation is the former and he gets up on the wrong side of the bed and defaults into early morning before wash his face and before his coffee and donut superficiality. But egotism is no foundation for egoism. No gravitas.

--Brant

somewhere in the middle

king of blather

I like Ambrose Bierce's definition of "egotist": "a person of low taste, more interested in himself than in me." :

Ghs

[caroljane]

Ambrose Bierce was out driving one day and turned into a bar.

For all we know.