Why Hockey is Better than Football


caroljane

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(1) It just is.

(2) Fewer silly-ass victory gymnastics for just doing your job. Also, it is harder to happy dance on skates unless you are Kurt Browning.

(3) NHL's Itty Bitty Bettman is marginally more ethical than Roger the Dodger Badell.

(4O Since Ballard, NHL team owners are marginally better than football team owners.

To be continued.....

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(2) Fewer silly-ass victory gymnastics for just doing your job. Also, it is harder to happy dance on skates unless you are Kurt Browning.

Vince Lombardi: "When you get into the end zone, act like you've been there before."

Amen!

On our team, you put the ball on the ground, or, flipped to the ref, rarely we would

"offer" it to a particularly dirty player and he would be marked for the 4th quarter,

or, when we had the game comfortably in hand.

It was called a "get Shultz play."

A...

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I am not a jock, so my views are objective. I have never been to a football game, though I have seen many downs' worth of plays on television (but never an entire Superbowl, or even an entire game). However, working security in Albuquerque, I did watch the minor league Scorpions play about half a dozen times; and my wife got free tickets for a game working for a local newspaper and we went to that.

I had a physics instructor in college who got his doctorate at the University of Chicago. He was a Black Hawks fan. "Admit it," a student once challenged him before class, "you like hockey because it is played on a frictionless surface."

Sure, football has projectile motion, but you can play a whole game without it (in theory); and in practice, you cannot skate on grass.

Hockey has fewer players on each team, so we have fewer bodies to keep track of.

In hockey, all the players have real jobs in play, not just bashing into the the other guy or preventing the other guy from bashing the quarterback.

Hockey can be played with one (or even two) players missing from a side. Everyone else just works harder. Football is not so flexible.

Ice skating take skill. Anyone can run with a ball -- or knock someone else down for carrying it.

Passing with the stick and stopping with the stick both take special skill. If you say to your wife, "Hey, honey, toss me your purse" and you catch it, you can play football.

In football, if you want to play rough, you just bash into someone and knock them down. Try that on ice and Newton sends you equally and oppositely gliding off. Bashing the other guy in hockey takes finesse.

Hockey players are bilingual. Football players barely speak English. (Except for Jim Ryan of the Cleveland Browns who had a Ph.D. in mathematics.)

Football is all about small incremental gains. Hockey is all or nothing.

In football, if you fail, you can punt. Hockey is all or nothing.

In football, if you fail, you can kick a field goal. Hockey is all or nothing.

If you are too much of a sissie for hockey, you can go into figure skating, which is still skillful and artistic. If you are too wussy for football, the only out is soccer.

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I am not a jock, so my views are objective.

Really?

So complete ignorance makes you objective?

Michael:

You have no clue how complicated and difficult the game of football is.

Most of your direct statements about football are...well...wrong.

Objectively speaking.

A...

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I am not a jock, so my views are objective.

Really?

So complete ignorance makes you objective?

Michael:

You have no clue how complicated and difficult the game of football is.

Most of your direct statements about football are...well...wrong.

Objectively speaking.

A...

Perhaps he needs to employ some "deep thinking"...as he once suggested to me. lol

-J

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I don't know enough about football to comment on Mike's comments there, but his hockey observations are sound. Hockey is all or nothing... Except for the abomination of shoot outs, imposed by boneheaded suits who think the fans need the catharsis of game winner everytime and cannot appreciate an honourable draw. Well, we don't and we can, we hate the damn things, the players hate them, the sports media hates them,save them for the finals.

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Reasons to Live even though you are a Toronto Sports Fan:

1. Blue Jays sucked again last year,,,

but, Dalton Pompey.

2. Raptors actually had a good year, but no good players want to move here because it is cold.

but, Masai Ujiri.

3'. Argos a aargh...

But, the Cfl still is, and we will not get the NFL here yet, and also, Pinball Clemons.

4. This is not as nice and uplifting a reason, in fact it is a pretty glum and mean one, but full disclosure, when you are desperate even a crummy reason is better than none-- I am rememberingJ once was grousing about how his hometeams were disasters except the women's world class basketball champs, which turned my mind to Minny (the Wild were terrific last year but whazzupwith Harding? Fighting MS isn't enough, he has to fight with his own teammates and get injured)?

Ok deep breath. Leafs disappointed again like always, got named the worst franchise again like always

... But though we may be stuck with Bob & Doug the McFord bros, at least we are not stuck with a Peterson or a Rice .

I told you it was glum, and I do not pretend that there may not be a violent

domestic abuser among the athletes who provide me with escapist refuge. I am just saying that I am not aware of any such rumours even, and do not have to think it possible unless such facts might come out. M The Graham James horror was worse even than the current ones, and hockey survived and learned from it.

Also, Wiliam Nylander, Stuart Percy, etc... There is always next year, or in Leafs case the year after next, eh?

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It is simple.

Hockey is not better than football, period.

Now some bigots might argue that since there are very few African Americans in hockey compared to football, that

there is less domestic violence.

A...

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It is simple.Hockey is not better than football, period.Now some bigots might argue that since there are very few African Americans in hockey compared to football, thatthere is less domestic violence.A...

It is simple.Hockey is not better than football, period.Now some bigots might argue that since there are very few African Americans in hockey compared to football, thatthere is less domestic violence.A...

oh, oh Adam., some might argue that but they would be just,as collectivist and wrong as those who would argue that there are fewer Americans, period, in the NHl, and that Americans, collectively kill more domestic partners via handguns because they have more access to them, and that the last NHLer accused of DVD was a Russian....but we are all too rational for such tosh, nestcepas.?

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Just read my last post and should explain I am again using myson s IPad and it seems to have somekind of autocorrect that changes what I deliberately write into a Malapropism. I would go and correct but DVD crimes is kind of funny and frankly I am just prolonging my usage till he reposses it, in fact watching the Toronto FC who are just too painful to talk about.

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Just read my last post and should explain I am again using myson s IPad and it seems to have somekind of autocorrect that changes what I deliberately write into a Malapropism. I would go and correct but DVD crimes is kind of funny and frankly I am just prolonging my usage till he reposses it, in fact watching the Toronto FC who are just too painful to talk about.

Geez Carol, since you have no rational arguments for Hockey being "better" [<<undefined I might point out, however I won't] than Football, I was trying to give you a PC argument that it benefits women and you turn it into an attack on your poor innocent neighbors, who have done nothing to our northerly neighbors.

And to pour gunpowder into our wounds we have suffered protecting Canada!

Attacking our sacred Second Amendment rights!!

Ah, the bitter tea you offer us!!

A...

DVD crimes is hilarious, especially when you consider the garbage that is imprinted on them...

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Just read my last post and should explain I am again using myson s IPad and it seems to have somekind of autocorrect that changes what I deliberately write into a Malapropism. I would go and correct but DVD crimes is kind of funny and frankly I am just prolonging my usage till he reposses it, in fact watching the Toronto FC who are just too painful to talk about.

Geez Carol, since you have no rational arguments for Hockey being "better" [<<undefined I might point out, however I won't] than Football, I was trying to give you a PC argument that it benefits women and you turn it into an attack on your poor innocent neighbors, who have done nothing to our northerly neighbors.And to pour gunpowder into our wounds we have suffered protecting Canada!Attacking our sacred Second Amendment rights!!Ah, the bitter tea you offer us!!A...DVD crimes is hilarious, especially when you consider the garbage that is imprinted on them...

You'll pay up the taxes on that tea one of these days...

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 2 months later...

Better to watch? Better to play? Both?

-J

To play, probably. Not that I can, but considering the inconvenience and expense most players gladly endure,, it must be a highly exhilirating experience,,as indeed most beer leaguers, shinny regulars and road hockey warriors report.
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I still like my answer best.

You would,! Funny, but not thankfully as raunchy as some of the chirping players dish out to goalies for example, when implying they are of feminine tendencies (throwing tampax "helpfully" at them is a mild example.

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