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caroljane

Canadian Politics: Boring beyond Belief, or just Dull and Tedious?

329 posts in this topic

I start this thread at the suggestion of a compatriot whom I interrupted in the midst of a Mideast discussion, because I had become alarmed at signs that Canada will be going to the polls again, as soon as the polls are favourable for the Government.

You Americans have your problems, but never knowing when you will have to elect a new government is not one of them. You at least can be sure that when you elect a President, you are pretty much stuck with him for four years, whatever he does. We can't vote for our Prime Minister unless we live in his home city, and we can theoretically kick him out whenever we want, except then we would have to vote even more frequently than usual.The PM's character and credentials are important of course, but he's only the leader of a party, and we only get to vote on the character and credentials of our local guy. We don't even get to make comments on the ballot about the party leaders' wives or husbands or anything. We get to make fun of their clothes and everything in the newspapers, but it isn't the same.

Is anybody still awake? No? Good. This is actually a cover for our benign cultural organization, whose motto is Boring from Within, a handy drop-in for Canucks and affiliates (you know who you are) to have friendly discussions of the Secret Plan.Therefore, to the strains of "Song for a Winter's Night", soft, soft...

To all our dear friends and trading partners, we wish you,

as ever,

Good Night and Good Neighbours

Edited by daunce lynam

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I was in hopes that this topic title would be so boring that nobody would read it, but somebody did and asked me the question: "Are all the stereotypes about Canadians true?"

The answer is yes, they are all true, any stereotype you can think of, except for one:

We do not say "aboot" for "about". Perhaps at some time in the past, some lone Canadian with a speech impediment said it in front of an American, and it went viral, but nobody says it now.

I and my family have travelled our great country from coast to coast wherever we have relatives to stay with for free, and I can state categorically that I have never, ever in my life heard any Canadian say "aboot."

In either official language.

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Again with the questions! Don't you know it's after Lights Out?

Yes, yes, all Canadians do play hockey, I myself play left wing for the Papa's Poutine & Souvlaki Hut Senior Sizzlers, although I have weak ankles and my forechecking is garbage. But I know my patriotic duty.

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Carol,

Tough question...let's see, boring - dull? Dull - boring?

I've gotta go with my first impression - dull.

You lot never, ever, make the world's front pages. Not even the back ones. Hockey played on WHAT? (Though that's a gutsy rugby team you send to the World Champs.)

However, all seriousness aside, I would be in 7th heaven to live in a country run by boring civil servants who occasionally got caught philandering or with their fingers in the, um, biscuit tin. No, that's not it: I'm thinking of that godawful place the Queen lives. Please, no.

Still, "May you live in interesting times" (and an interesting country)-

is not all it's cracked up to be. It gets exhausting.

Tony

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Carol,

Tough question...let's see, boring - dull? Dull - boring?

I've gotta go with my first impression - dull.

You lot never, ever, make the world's front pages. Not even the back ones. Hockey played on WHAT? (Though that's a gutsy rugby team you send to the World Champs.)

However, all seriousness aside, I would be in 7th heaven to live in a country run by boring civil servants who occasionally got caught philandering or with their fingers in the, um, biscuit tin. No, that's not it: I'm thinking of that godawful place the Queen lives. Please, no.

Still, "May you live in interesting times" (and an interesting country)-

is not all it's cracked up to be. It gets exhausting.

Tony

"The happiest countries, like the happiest women, have no history" would have been the opening quote of my masterpiece thesis, but I would have to try and find out who said it; boring, tedious work.

Edited by daunce lynam

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FRATERNAL ORDER OF THE SACRED IGLOO Local 13

Dear Brothers,

First, a chilly welcome to our two newest members. Each Initiation renews the blubber and sinew of our fellowship, and strengthens us all for the snows of tomorrow.

1. Conference planning is well in hand. As you know, there has been some discussion as to this year's venue, with some stating flatly that they will not go camping at Great Slave Lake again, so we are looking at places a little further from the Arctic Circle. Brother Tony, do you have a big house?

2. The Cultural Committee has called a special meeting to deal with the Senators crisis. On Feb. 14 the topic will be: "Mike Fisher: Samson, or Benedict Arnold?"

3. The overdue Treasurer's Report will be submitted as soon as Brother Joel returns from his business trip to Aglakurq CasinoRama.

As always, we thank Claudine and the Ladies' Auxiliary for the delicious pemmican snacks.

In solidarity and sealmeat,

Doug

Acting Shaman

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“The only reason we want to separate from Canada.”~ any
Quebecers
on Mounties

The Royal Canadian Mounted Police', RCMP, or Mount-Me have dedicated themselves to the protection of five things (those things being hockey, "chesterfields", women tied to railroads, the Canadian flag, and ketchup chips). Not to be confused with the Registered Collectors for the Mafia in Parliament, also know as the RCMP

180px-399px-Hotcanadianmounties.jpgMounties are prepared for anything!

So are these Registered Collectors for the Mafia in Parliament an official part of Canadian politics?

Adam

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“The only reason we want to separate from Canada.”~ any
Quebecers
on Mounties

The Royal Canadian Mounted Police', RCMP, or Mount-Me have dedicated themselves to the protection of five things (those things being hockey, "chesterfields", women tied to railroads, the Canadian flag, and ketchup chips). Not to be confused with the Registered Collectors for the Mafia in Parliament, also know as the RCMP

180px-399px-Hotcanadianmounties.jpgMounties are prepared for anything!

So are these Registered Collectors for the Mafia in Parliament an official part of Canadian politics?

Adam

Welcome Brother Adam! You get an affiliate membership for this.

Your appendix on Dat Place will be invaluable for the indoctrination of our new Brothers. They've nearly finished Anne of Green Gables and are ready to move westwards in the mystical journey.

Your Secret Name and church key will be delivered under cover of darkness.

The Bonhomme quote was the best.

Still giggling,

Carol

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There are Canadians who say "aboot", when they should be saying "about." Daunce's attempt to influence the historical record needs to be corrected on this point.

I have heard such Canadians with my own ears. They live near Bala, Ontario, in the Muskoka Lakes region. These Canadian individuals implicitly adhere to the Benevolent Universe Premise: i.e., they are hard drinkers and pretty good golfers; this American holds no grudges on the account of such pronunciations, nay, I even find them charming.

I fear Daunce will now speak ill of me for these revelations. For the sake of all that is true, I am willing to pay that price.

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There are Canadians who say "aboot", when they should be saying "about." Daunce's attempt to influence the historical record needs to be corrected on this point.

I have heard such Canadians with my own ears. They live near Bala, Ontario, in the Muskoka Lakes region. These Canadian individuals implicitly adhere to the Benevolent Universe Premise: i.e., they are hard drinkers and pretty good golfers; this American holds no grudges on the account of such pronunciations, nay, I even find them charming.

I fear Daunce will now speak ill of me for these revelations. For the sake of all that is true, I am willing to pay that price.

I? Speak ill? No, indeed, to the contrary. I am excited that you have discovered a hitherto unknown tribe in the wilds of Bala. Another tuft on the intellectual pelt of the Order, added by our newest Brother who is still on probation.

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The election will be announced soon. Jack Layton has called me three times to invite me to a town hall meeting. It's the only place we can ever be seen together in public so I guess I'll go.

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Canada is the Kinder, Gentler America that Bush the Elder often prattled about.

Ba'al Chatzaf

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> There are Canadians who say "aboot", when they should be saying "about."

The first time I ever heard this kind of abuse of the English language was out of the mouth of Leonard Peikoff.

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The election will be announced soon. Jack Layton has called me three times to invite me to a town hall meeting. It's the only place we can ever be seen together in public so I guess I'll go.

I always imagine our politicians using their electoral rhetoric at home. Layton strikes me as one who has a hard time shifting into normal English. Here is him at home complaining about Olivia's household management, and calling on the kids to help sway the House.

"Canadians are asking for a change of the towels. Folks losing their socks, looking at their last pay cheque don’t know where to turn. Husbands are trying to decide what bills they can afford to pay. There is a majority Coalition in this House that’s ready to act on pressing issues for Canadian families. For the families already hurting from the economic crisis, we are having meatloaf, again. Business and labour leaders demanded action, and we get meatloaf, again. How long will ordinary Canadians put up with this government's refusal to listen to the people?"

Read more: http://www.ndp.ca/press/jack-laytons-speech-to-toronto-rally-for-change#ixzz1Dm7fvEWN

Edited by william.scherk

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The election will be announced soon. Jack Layton has called me three times to invite me to a town hall meeting. It's the only place we can ever be seen together in public so I guess I'll go.

I always imagine our politicians using their electoral rhetoric at home. Layton strikes me as one who has a hard time shifting into normal English. Here is him at home complaining about Olivia's household management, and calling on the kids to help sway the House.

"Canadians are asking for a change of the towels. Folks losing their socks, looking at their last pay cheque don’t know where to turn. Husbands are trying to decide what bills they can afford to pay. There is a majority Coalition in this House that’s ready to act on pressing issues for Canadian families. For the families already hurting from the economic crisis, we are having meatloaf, again. Business and labour leaders demanded action, and we get meatloaf, again. How long will ordinary Canadians put up with this government's refusal to listen to the people?"

Read more: http://www.ndp.ca/press/jack-laytons-speech-to-toronto-rally-for-change#ixzz1Dm7fvEWN

I love it. It even gets better when his Chinese mother-in-law (who lives with them) gets home from the flea market to show them her bargains.

"Nice new picture, look. Only twenty fi cent and all bright not like old Ed Bloadbent up on wall. Jack you go get nail, I can climb ladder."

Note to southerners:

Layton is the leader of the NDP, the leftest of the three biggest parties here. Broadbent is a former, much-loved leader of that party.

Edited by daunce lynam

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Note to southerners:

Layton is the leader of the NDP, the leftest of the three biggest parties here. Broadbent is a former, much-loved leader of that party.

Are you trying to kill the American readers here, Carol? This is going beyond boring and tedious into lethal force.

But, since you bring out the heavy weapons, like Jack's Chinese mother-in-law, I am going to go one-up, into 'if you read this you will probably die' territory.

Cite: Jack Layton speaks about cancer:

Dressed in a traditional grey, fitted Mao jacket, Jack Layton walked into the Metro Convention Centre to loud applause and cheers.

It was an entrance befitting a tiger.

In his first appearance following the announcement of his cancer prognosis, Layton and his wife, Olivia Chow, were all smiles as they attended the Yee Hong Community Wellness Foundation’s 21st Dragon Ball gala last weekend to help raise $1 million for its four nursing homes.

“Being a tiger will help ... I’m hoping the Year of the Tiger will help beat the cancer,” Layton said, adding his mother-in-law also was born under the tiger sign — one of 12 in the Chinese zodiac cycle.

“Let’s hope the fierce determination of the tiger will help us turn the corner economically and hopefully it’ll be a strong year for the Chinese community in Toronto.”

NOT DEAD YET? Hah! This will most likely finish you off. Call the funeral director and kiss your children.

Cite: Statement on Mother’s Day by Jack Layton, leader of the New Democrats

This Mother’s Day let’s recommit to achieving progress that can make a difference for mothers: creating a national child care program; ensuring EI benefits for mothers fired when just back from maternity leave; and supporting primary care-givers.

STILL BREATHING?

Okay, the penultimate Canadian killing machine. Jack Layton on The Hour. Say your goodbyes . . . don't make me post a video of Jack Layton speaking his bromides in French!!!!!!

Edited by william.scherk

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...who's the favorites for the hockey league this year?

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Wow.

That is sad, the dude still wears a Nehru jacket!

Who is he trying to be...Hilary Rodham Rodham Clinton?

AAAAAjRQcTQAAAAAAMt8Eg.jpg?v=1202627232000

I burned mine in 1970, the jacket not Hilary.

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...who's the favorites for the hockey league this year?

All the money is on Team PEI

PS -- why aren't you dead?

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...who's the favorites for the hockey league this year?

All the money is on Team PEI

PS -- why aren't you dead?

My patient is recovering from a comatose state - pulse steady, but ECG remains low. Have recommended a change of environment, and have moved him to the OLiving Islam section.

Dr.___

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...who's the favorites for the hockey league this year?

All the money is on Team PEI

PS -- why aren't you dead?

MacDonald, of course. Obviously a CaBretoner who braved the perilous journey to the bright lighthouses and unlimited horizons of PEI where dreams can be realized. Those people are so versatile. They rule the coal mines deep, and are the seas' commander.

Carol

niece of Mary daughter of Angus son of Mary daughter of Angus you get the picture

Edited by daunce lynam

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Wai? Wai? That my daughter? Meimei you pick up phone. That Lick Mercer he come to door with overnight bag again. I say to him, Jack not here, he go Quebec to Duceppe place, you go stay there. Hee-hee!Las time he leave newspaper and bottle all under bed. You say to your husband, I make his favourite potine gai pan tonight.He tell me he sick tired meatloaf.

Edited by daunce lynam

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...who's the favorites for the hockey league this year?

All the money is on Team PEI

PS -- why aren't you dead?

MacDonald, of course. Obviously a CaBretoner who braved the perilous journey to the bright lighthouses and unlimited horizons of PEI where dreams can be realized. Those people are so versatile. They rule the coal mines deep, and are the seas' commander.

The Jewish MacDonalds of Cape Breton are fearsome indeed, but hold not a candle to the Maronite Arabs of PEI, who twice seized power in that province via free and fair elections. For those who think that PEI is only potatoes, Anne of Green Gables and incredible women's field hockey, I invite you to look up the Ghiz family, whose blended Scottish and Lebanese ancestry represents all that is Canuckistani politics -- a seething horror of boredom and normality.

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For those US readers who have yet managed to stave off coma or death, I give you a video of our Prime Minister singing the Who's The Seeker at a secret Party gathering.

Here is that same Prime Minister hosting a sleepover at his official residence with Canada's (Newfie, gay, atheist) John Stewart, shown on State Television.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8FGIQpdtS_Y

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wss, we better watch it. The video of Hardper singing has been disappeared, obviously by CSIS. or maybe those Trotskyites at the Royal Conservatory of Music.

Edited by daunce lynam

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